Chapter One
Chapter One Pregnant. I can hardly believe the words coming out of my mouth. Me. Pregnant. With a baby. I thought Kellan was losing it when he rushed in and put his ear to my belly, shushing me when I asked what on Earth he was up to. I’ll never forget the look in his beautiful grass-green eyes when he raised his head. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so much pure emotion pour out of another being and feel it seep into my own soul such as it had in that moment. Kellan then proceeded to press his face against my belly, occasionally drying happy tears on my shirt, which is where he still remains. Mere seconds later I’m gathered in Logan’s long-armed embrace and spun around until I’m dizzy. “I knew I made the right call in keeping you, you fantastic little creature! Our baby is going to be fucking gorgeous, just you wait and see. Paris and Milan will go to war to have our beautiful pup walk their runways,” He tells me dreamily, already picturing it in his head. I toss my head back and laugh at his silly declarations before hugging him harder and accepting the wild kiss he delivers upon me. When my vision finally catches up with the room, I’m able to take in the rest of my mates as they look on with various expressions. Logan hands me off to Tristan, who is beaming his perfect Tristan smile at me. I receive a hug from him as well, and a promise of a celebratory feast tonight in honor of our “little miracle”. Reed and Jace approach me together, both taking kisses of their own, while Reed promises a proper, private celebration with just the two of us later this evening, and Jace informs me that we should name the baby Jace III, his trademark smirk in place. I have to laugh at the reminder of the Big Jace/Little Jace fiasco. While the non-teddy bear Jace took the whole thing in stride, it sure didn’t stop his prideful need to remind me just how big he truly is. Actually, I think I totally deserve a pat on the back for that one. Who knew a prank would turn out to be so rewarding? Finn responds just as I knew he would—without words. He lays his emotions, raw and unfiltered, out for my perusal within his minty green eyes. I’m sure his brilliant mind is battling countless thoughts of everything he’s ever learned about pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting, but he doesn’t voice those things now. I keep quiet, too, and just let him hold me as he inhales deeply at my hair. Both of us just want to feel right now, not think. Although I’m sure lessons with Finn will, no doubt, take a turn to all things baby moving forward. That’s probably a good thing, as I have yet to excel at any of the social interaction lessons. At Finn’s suggestion, everyone except Remy and Ash head out of the family room and busy themselves to give the three of us a moment alone. Both men before me act as if they are glued to their posts at the entryway. For the first time in what seems like forever, I’m nervous around my mates. Ash stands as tall as ever in his V-neck t-shirt, dark-wash jeans, boots, and black leather jacket. Oh, the things that jacket does for his insanely attractive figure. His big brown eyes are blown wide and staring at me unblinkingly as tanned skin ripples over endless muscles. I know he’s fighting the need for his wolf to take over, and a pang of understanding hits me square in the chest. My poor Shadow doesn’t do well with emotions, does he? Part of me wishes I knew what he was thinking right now, but the other, more sensible, part of me knows that I’d probably be very scared of the thoughts in my overprotective giant’s mind. Still, Ash’s reaction is a whole lot better than Remy’s. I think I might have broken Remy. I’m not even sure if he’s breathing. His bright copper hair appears even brighter and his already fair skin has taken on a ghostly pale color. The blank expression on his handsome face, and in his intimidating grey eyes that seem to see nothing at all, has me worried. My mates and I haven’t exactly spoken of children before. I mean, comments have been made, but this little alien inside of me wasn’t planned or anything. Remy may not have been born an alpha like Grandfather speaks about, but he’s our family’s alpha—he’s my alpha, and his opinion matters to me very much. Is he angry with me? Angry that he didn’t get a say about this? My heart pounds harder at the thought, and my need to please my alpha mate has me taking a cautious step forward. “Remington?” I breathe out. The sound of my voice snaps both men out of their strange trance, and they blink their dazzling eyes at me before glancing briefly at each other. I gasp in shock—and somewhat horror—as a glistening tear falls from Ash’s eye and Remy erupts in booming, happy laughter. The two very large men move to embrace one another, clapping each other on the back. My head tilts to the side as I watch them curiously, confused by their actions. As adorable as the two of them are right now, I can’t but help think how very strange men are. Ash turns away from Remy to look at me and I feel my whole world stop. There are no words to describe the look he gives me in that moment. The wide smile, the tears, the love that radiates out of this man…it’s all too much for me. I rush to Ash, jumping as high as I can so that I can wrap myself around him like a pretzel. I sob with my face buried in his neck, inhaling his fiery scent, and hold on to him like my life depends on it. This man, all of my men, couldn’t be more beautiful if they tried, both inside and out. I have no idea why I’m crying. Maybe happiness, maybe because I’m so utterly confused as to what I’ve done in my life to deserve them, and the very real fear that one day they will ask the same question. But I can’t seem to stop. My mates let me cry out whatever emotions I needed to exorcise for what feels like forever. With Ash glued to my front and Remy plastered to my back, I’m not sure if I ever want to move again. Eventually, though, Remy gently coaxes me down and places me back on my feet. Ash’s huge hand rubs at my back as I’m turned to face Remy. His hand shakes a bit as he slowly brushes my hair away from my face, until every strand is tucked behind my ears. His rough fingers continue to caress my face, running under my chin and eventually over my lips with the barest of touches. He kisses me then, soft and sweet and completely devastating to my already too-full heart. “Kitten…” He whispers my name like a prayer, sinking to his knees in front of me and placing his forehead against my tummy. I take the opportunity to run my hands through his coarse hair that reminds me of the sky at sunset, scratching lightly at his scalp with my nails as he likes me to do. Remy starts to speak a couple of times, but it’s as if he can’t find the right words to say. I give him time, eventually moving my free arm to hold him to me. I’ve decided that I very much like this position and I don’t want him to move. “I don’t think I can ever explain what this child means to me, Kitten. I’ve lived for so many years, so many decades and centuries, knowing I could never be a father. Knowing I would never have a son to teach to hunt or fish, or even ride a bike. Or a daughter to look at me in that way only daughters can look upon their fathers. Like the sun rises and sets by my willpower alone, that no harm could ever come to her because I’m her dad and no man will ever be greater. I’ve watched so many children be born to this world, so many families made and I…this child, this little life growing inside of you, is my deepest desire come true.” He raises his head to look at me, even though we’re nearly face to face as is. “You, Kitten, are my greatest love, my deepest joy, and now you’re going to be the mother of my child. The words “thank you” will never be enough, but I vow to spend every waking moment of the rest of my life showing you how grateful I am to have you in my life. You brought my family closer together already, in our shared love for you, and now you give us a new member. A new life to cherish, and celebrate, and love.” My mouth opens to speak, but no words come out. Tears of my own spring up and make warm tracks down my cheeks as I try to form a response worthy of such a declaration. “So, you’re not mad.” I blurt. So glad I took the time for that lovely thought, I chastise myself mentally. Both Remy and Ash laugh, each of them hugging me once more before clearing their throats and taking a deep breath. Remy gets to his feet and smiles down at me, shaking his head. “I could never be angry at you for such a gift, Love.” “I’m not as eloquent as Rem, but what he said holds true for me, too. I’m happy with the family I already have, but this child already means the world to me, Baby,” Ash tells me. I giggle at his use of my nickname. “I don’t think you can all me that anymore, Ash. The baby will be Baby, right?” Ash narrows his eyes roguishly. “I’ll call either of you whatever I like, as both of you will always be precious to me and protected by me. You’re both mine to care for.” “Oh, really? Does that mean I call you ‘Baby’, then? You’re mine to care for,” I joke. “Oh, please do. I insist,” Remy prods with a devilish grin. Ash just shakes his head and rolls his eyes at the two of us. Wow. Feast is an understatement. “Tristan, you have outdone yourself, truly,” I tell him with awe. The large conference table in the meeting room is almost completely covered with piled plates of food. Hams, turkeys, and several whole chickens make a line down the center of the table, surrounded by mashed potatoes, ears of corn, salads, baked breads, and even a few things I have no name for. I don’t know where to start. Part of me just wants to roll around in it all and take bites of whatever ends up near my face. “Aww, you broke her, Tris,” Logan jokes with an elbow to Tristan’s side. When I narrow my eyes at him playfully, he just sticks his tongue out at me. “I’m not broken, just…awed, I guess. How did you make all of this? And it smells so wonderful!” I make my way to Tristan and wrap my arms around his torso as hard as I can. “Thank you.” “Anything for my girl,” he tells me with a peck on my forehead. “And wolf speed does help a bit, though I had plenty of helpers today. Mike, here, was one of them; we may have a budding chef on our hands with that one,” he says fondly, looking to Mikey, making him blush in embarrassment. “Yeah! I helped. I peeled potatoes and carrots and got to smash them, too!” Mikey tells me excitedly. Jace grunts in amusement. “You put the kid on scut work?” Tristan shrugs a shoulder. “Every good chef starts out on the bottom.” “I bet you did,” Logan mumbles with a wicked grin. Ash and Remy laugh as Tristan releases me to chase a cackling Logan around the table. There was probably a joke in there somewhere, but it’s over my head. All of the guys have been playful and lighthearted today. More smiles and laughter and back-patting have gone on since this morning than I’ve experienced in a lifetime. I like this. I like seeing them all so happy. I let Mikey pull me to a seat near the middle and sit beside him as he tells me about his day in the kitchen. I’ve been thinking all day about how to break the news to him. I’m not sure how much he’ll care one way or the other, but it’s important to me to go about this the right way with him. I also feel like since bringing him home from the hospital Mikey and I haven’t spent much time together, and there’s a lot of things left unsaid and undecided between us. I did, however, come to a decision today. I thought about waiting until I spoke with all of my mates, but even then, my own mind is made up. They can choose whatever they wish, but it won’t change for me. A natural lull in conversation in the middle of dinner has me shifting nervously as I look to Mikey, watching him dip bits of his chicken into gravy. “Mikey, I want to talk to you about something.” He drops his chicken, eyes going wide as he sits back and turns to me with his palms out. “It wasn’t my fault! Perry started it, and Morris was the one who drove it! I told them they’d get in trouble. I only got in to make sure they didn’t get hurt.” He nods his little head emphatically. I blink at him at few times. “Uh…what?” Well, this isn’t how I thought this would go. “He’s talking about him and his friends getting a hold of one of my forklifts. They managed to push the right controls to get it work and went for a little joyride,” Remy explains, the reproach clear in his voice. I put my head in my hands and sigh. Clearly this was something we’d have to address, and it only adds to my guilt about not watching him like I should. I try again. “That isn’t what I wanted to talk about, Mikey. Please just listen for a moment, because I want you to think about this seriously. I don’t want to push you into anything, and I want it to be your decision only, okay?” I can almost see the walls slam down over his emotions. Given everything that has happened to him in his young life I’m not surprised, though it hurts to see it all the same. “O…kay?” “It’s nothing bad,” I promise quickly. “It’s just that…ever since you to came to live with us there’s been an open-ended question about what we are to each other. I think of you as family now, and I think I considered you family for a long time even before. I just didn’t know what it really meant. Does that make sense?” I’m rambling and I know it. “Sort of,” he answers warily. “Well, you see, I left it up to you before, about whether you would see me as more of a sister or aunt or… a mother figure.” I pause, trying to read him. He just looks confused. “Yeah?” “And, well, it’s still up to you, of course, but I’d like to take on more of a mother role for you. I feel like leaving it open before may have made you think I didn’t want to. Honestly, I didn’t know if I wanted to. I didn’t and still don’t know what it means really, but I’d like to try.” My heart feels like it’s beating way too fast and I’m so nervous. Mikey takes his time answering, pushing food around his plate before looking back to me. “You mean you want to be my mom?” I, too, take my time answering, but for different reasons. He could say no. “I do. I found out earlier today that I’m going to have a baby. After some thought I realized that, while this might be my first baby, it won’t be my first child. Not the first child that I’d die to protect, not the first child that I’d do anything to make happy and safe. I already have a child I’d do those things for. You. You mean the world to me, Mikey. I’m probably a horrible pick for a mom, but you have me if you want me.” I try to smile, but I’m near tears for some reason. To my absolute horror, he laughs. Like really hard, holding his stomach laughing. Then he throws his thin little arms around me in a side hug. Speaking lowly, so he thinks only I can hear, he tells me, “Okay, Mom.” Tears sting the back of my eyelids as I feel a hole I wasn’t aware of stitch itself back together again in my chest. “Really?” I pull back so I can see his face. He looks happy, lips turned up in a grin. I awkwardly put my arms around him, too, pulling him closer. He pulls away first, already nodding up and down. “Yeah. Back at the ice rink, I used to tell new kids that you were my mom. They didn’t believe me, but I didn’t care.” He shrugs like it’s nothing. While he goes back to his food, considering the matter over and done with, I finally glance around the table, not knowing what to expect from my men. Kellan and Finn are seated across from me, so my eyes land on them first. Twin grins greet me and I can tell they aren’t angered. Jace’s golden eyes shine with something I can’t understand, and Logan smirks like he knew this was coming. Ash is hard to read, but he nods once in approval. Remington gives me a look like we’ll talk about this later, but his body is relaxed and I get a sense of approval from him as well. Reed mouths, “I love you” with a smile, while Tristan leans around Mikey to kiss the top of my head. No one makes a big deal out of the discussion, simply going back to enjoying their meal, and I’m thankful for it. I really don’t want to start crying again. It might give Mikey the wrong idea, and I honestly can’t predict how long the crying will take anymore. I let out a relieved and calming breath. Knowing that, no matter their reactions, I would still feel the same about Mikey didn’t mean that I wasn’t worried about what they thought. I’ll proudly claim the title of mom, but that doesn’t mean that they had to stand up and take on the role of Mikey’s father. Or, well, fathers. I still don’t know if they will, or if they want to, but from this day forward Mikey Ivaskov is my son. I’ll have to figure out this whole mom thing as soon as possible, because I want to be a really good one for both him and this baby.
Chapter Two
Chapter Two I watch his black curls bounce around his shoulders as we jump over the cracks on the hard walking space. He was kind enough to warn me earlier that stepping on the cracks would break his mother’s back, so I concentrate hard on avoiding them. Friends don’t break their friends’ mother’s backs. The boy takes my hand as I stop outside of his sleeping place, and he drags me through the door behind him. It smells nice in here, like food and warmness. I hear one of those magic boxes with people trapped inside, like they had in the hospital, but the boy pulls me to a smaller room with a table and a tall person with her back to us. “Hey, baby, did you have fun at the park?” she asks my friend without turning around. What is she doing? I hear water and splashing, but I can’t figure out what she’s doing with the eating things. Plates, those are plates. “Yes!” My friend tells her as he lets go of my hand and walks around the small room. “I made a friend, can we have a sleepover?” “Hmm, I don’t know, honey. Do I know his parents? Do you go to school with him?” she asks. “She doesn’t have parents. I promise I’ll feed her and give her a bath. I’ll take good care of her, Mom, I swear!” He pleads with Mom, going to her and hugging her leg. “What on Earth are you going on about, boy? She? And everyone has parents, Tony.” Mom admonishes as she dries her hands on a rag. She turns to face me, her eyes going wide and her hand going to her chest. “E-ever one h-ham parent? E-even smeee?” I ask hopefully, speaking slowly and as clearly as I can. Mom lets out an ear-piercing scream that scares me, while she grabs my friend and pulls him close to her. “What is that? Oh my God, Tony! What have you done? It’s…it’s an alien…or…or some kind of beast!” She continues to yell at me, placing my friend Tony on top of the table and grabbing a long stick with something on the end of it. I look behind me for the beast, scared that it will get me. It’s a good thing Mom has a stick. Should I climb up on the table…Oww! Hurt starts on my arm and I look back to Mom. She has the stick raised in the air and she’s looking right at me again. “Get out of here! Git! You leave my son alone, you hear me?” she screams, poking me with the stick, hard. I hiss at her. Mom is mean. “No, Mommy! She’s my friend! She’s a nice alien, she eats berries off the tree in the park, not people!” my friend Tony pleads. She takes a step toward me, the stick raised again to hit me. I back away from her and she lets me turn and run away from their sleeping place. As I run back toward my own sleeping place, I step on every crack along the way. Tears leak down my face as I take time to stomp on some of the bigger ones, wondering if I’ve broken Mom’s back yet. I hope so, because my friend is in danger. I hope she doesn’t hit him with the stick, too. And what about the beast? I end up going to the big warm place that always makes me feel better. Maybe one of the tall people will tell stories again. When I arrive, I notice there’s not many people here this time. The tall person called Librarian is at her table, though, and she frowns down at me. Before she asks me her usual questions, I ask her one. “W-what tis awien?” “Oh, sweetie. Where did you hear that word?” she asks. I shake my head. “Awien,” I repeat for her. “A-wi-eeen. I tis awian?” I sound out, like she’s showed me before. Librarian clears her throat, like she does when I make her sad and she doesn’t want me to know. “An alien is science-fiction; they’re not real. Some people think they are real, that they’re another species from another planet, or outer space, who might one day try to take over the world or enslave humans, and other nonsense like that.” She steps slowly around her table to kneel in front of me. “So, Kitten, you can’t be an alien, you see?” I shake my head at her again. “No, I tis awien. I takes world and swace p-pawents come b-back fur smeee. I not Titten, I awien.” I stomp my foot and cross my arms to make my point. Everyone has parents, Mom said, so maybe mine are out in space, with the lights in the sky, and they just forgot where they left me. They’ll come back for me, I know it, and when they do, we’ll take over the world like aliens do. “Kitten. Sweetie, is everything okay?” Reed’s voice is rough with sleep as he gently shakes me awake. It takes me moment to remember where I am, or better yet when I am. That’s the third time this week that I’ve dreamed so hard I become disoriented upon waking. Only they aren’t really dreams, are they? Scenes from my past seem to haunt me, just waiting until I’m too tired to fight them back. “Just a dream. Go back to sleep,” I tell him quietly, running my fingers through his blonde locks. His breathing evens out in moments, and I can tell he’s asleep again. After last night, I’m surprised he could even form words. That man and his tongue…insatiable. I, on the other hand, don’t think I’ll be sleeping again. I don’t know why these dreams are coming on so strong lately, but I feel like they’re happening for a reason. The reason for this memory was pretty clear. I had thought the term ‘alien’ earlier, about the baby, so I was given the memory of when I was younger and was determined to be an alien. A baby. I still can’t believe it. My life has been a constant whirlwind for months now. I can clearly picture the day I first met Tristan and Ash. Or the Giant and Chocolate-eyes, as I had named them that day. Until that night, that day had gone as most days did for me. I had checked in with my various jobs to see if they had work for me. The diner had let me wash dishes, although it was an odd shift that left me returning home after dark. Skipping over accidentally falling asleep, and the resulting assault, I remember how I had felt running away. I had told myself at the time that I refused to give up, but looking back I realize that I had. I made my body move, but inside I had been dying a slow death; a battle I wasn’t aware of. I wanted something more, some connection to this world other than the breath I took into my lungs. Then, by fate or by chance, they had shown up. One as tall and thick as a tree and the other with a voice like silk. They saw me. Not just a broken girl, but me. They brought me to their home, brought me into their family. I may have started out as a fun project for Logan, but he took care of me that first day without question. He and Kellan both. I smile to myself in the dark, remembering how I also started out as a threat to Jace, and being scared to death of Remy. Tristan had fed me, Reed had smiled shyly at me, and Finn was and forever would be my Mr. Wolf. Paintballing, carnival rides, Noah, motorcycle rides, and shopping trips with Ash. It’s hard not to laugh right now. I loved them even then. Maybe not in the same way as I do now, but it was the start. My love has just grown since then. One of my favorite memories was being on the ice, having them watch me skate from the stands, and finally knowing what it felt like to have people you cared about cheering you on. It happened fast, faster than it probably does for others. I regret being so cold toward Jace. Time is funny that way, isn’t it? Looking back, I know he was sorry for the things he said long before I forgave him. And he never should have been sorry in the first place. He was and is protective of his family, in his own way. I love him dearly for that very reason now. I think it was mere weeks before I was taken from them. Actually, I spent more time away from them than I had with them at that point. That’s a place in my head I don’t want to go right now, or maybe ever. It was too late after that, though. I already loved them. Knowing that at least some of them were still out there was all that kept me going. Becoming a wolf, becoming like them, was just something that had happened along the way. Kind of like finding out my last name, that I had blood family ready to accept me, and that an entire pack of wolves would come to depend on me. All of that was just life happening, but my reason for life started the moment Ash and Tristan saved me from giving up at that angel fountain. They were what I was looking for all along. A connection, a place where I belonged. And here we all are, getting ready to bring new life into our family and accepting another child as our own. We’re growing our pack already, and it’s only been months. I don’t know what my past has to do with any of it, but I as I lay here, thinking over how exactly I got here, I know without a doubt that I can face anything. Because I’m not alone anymore, not because of my mate that I feel beside me, or because of the baby growing inside of me, but because there’s simply no going back now. Not for any of us. And I think that this is what family means. Forming bonds that simply cannot be broken, because we won’t allow them to, because we don’t want them to. “What are you thinking so hard about?” Reed asks, pulling me out of my head. I shift around, now noticing that the sun has begun to rise, and my sensitive, multi-color-eyed mate has been watching me. I smile lazily at him, reaching out to run my fingertips over his jaw, tracing his thin, pink lips. “I was thinking of us. All of us. We’ve had a crazy ride so far. I keep dreaming of my past, back when I was little. I don’t know what it means.” His hand covers my own, placing a kiss in my palm, entwining our fingers and laying them between us. “What was it like when you were little?” I frown, trying to find the right words. “Confusing, I guess. Everything was kind of a mystery. What things were named, why people went here and did that. Why I wasn’t like everyone around me. I wasn’t sad or angry most of the time, but confused.” “I can only imagine. I guess you learned a lot of things out of order.” “I wished for words. That’s what went through my head the most. I never had the words,” I try to explain. “Words for what?” he prods. “Imagine standing on the grass in your bare feet, still damp from an overnight rain just as the sun starts to paint the sky in every amazing color there is. A soft wind is blowing through your hair, you can feel it on your fingertips. A bakery across the street has been working for hours by that point and decides to open their doors to let out some of the heat from the kitchen. The smell of fresh baked bread and pastries carries on the wind to you.” Reed’s smile turns soft and I know that his artistic mind can paint it all clearly for him. “Now, imagine not knowing what you’re standing on. Why is it softer here than the hard stuff next to it? What makes the water fall from up above sometimes, when other times it doesn’t? Where does the ball of light go and why does it come back? You don’t know the names of the colors you see, or what presses against your skin. You smell something new in the air that you breathe, but you don’t know why you like it or why it makes your mouth water and your stomach hurt. You just recognize the smell as food, something you’re supposed to eat, but you know that if you follow the smell the tall people won’t let you eat the food.” Reed closes his eyes, the skin right below pinkening in the way that it does when he fights back his emotions. The dreamy smile is now gone from his face, replaced with a crestfallen expression. “I can picture that, and I don’t know if I would’ve been strong enough to endure it.” He takes a deep breath, gripping my hands tightly. “Kitten, I know you don’t like me to go “all sad”, but I just don’t understand how you made it through your childhood. Babies and young children can’t make it on their own. Without someone to provide the basics needed for survival, they die.” “I’m aware of that now. I should have died a million times over. At best, I should be mentally handicapped from malnutrition and neglect. I should’ve gotten sick from unfiltered water and bacteria. But I didn’t, and I think I know why now. Like right now, from this conversation.” I feel my eyes widen and my heartrate pick up at the realization. “Tell me,” Reed says softly, making me realize it’s been a while since I’ve spoken. “Because of her…my wolf. I think she was with me this whole time. Everyone keeps saying that I’m different, that I’m not a born wolf but I’m also not a changed wolf. I’m somewhere in between. I think my wolf was always a part of me, waiting to be released. It would explain a lot anyway. The instincts of a human alone wouldn’t have kept me alive, but the instincts of a wolf might have.” “Or the instincts of both.” He finishes my thought. “If you had the ability to heal yourself, even slightly, that would explain a lot of things.” “Yeah, it’s a theory anyway.” He raises himself up, gently placing a kiss on my forehead. “I love that beautiful brain of yours. Whatever the reason, I’m grateful that you survived long enough for me to find you.” “Me, too. Enough about me, though. What was it like when you were little?” I ask, curious to know more about him. I know the him now, as I do the others, but I don’t know a whole lot about the before me times of their lives. Reed smiles as his eyes drift off behind me, or maybe into the past. “My mother was an artist. Did I mention that?” I shake my head no. “That explains you, though,” I tease. He laughs, pulling me to him and throwing his leg over mine. “Probably. From the time that I can remember there were always drawings flung all over the house, and her hands and sometimes face had charcoal all over them. She was a sketch artist. She made money as a seamstress, not in art, but it was her real passion. I was born in New York, but both of my parents were immigrants. I can’t for the life of me remember where they came from, but that’s probably because as soon as they stepped off that boat, they were Americans. That’s what my dad always said, anyway.” I stay quiet, just listening to him talk. I wonder if our child will have memories like these, of him, covered in paint most of the time. “I remember running around muddy streets filled with people, clothes hanging from lines across buildings, and really hot, stinky summers. What my dad did then, I have no idea. He worked outside of the home. He would bring things home, though, something my mother would chide him about not having space for. Then one day we were packing all of that stuff onto a cart, and we left New York for good.” “Where did you go?” I ask. “I guess my parents had been longing to head out west for a long time. They were saving up for the trip. I remember hating that damn wagon, though. I slept a lot and I have memories of digging the wheels out of mud with my dad. Also, campfires. Lots and lots of campfires and flat bread. I grew up a lot on that trip, but everyday was basically the same, so my memories are all scattered. I did learn to hunt, and I liked doing that. My mother learned to cook, and she loathed doing that.” He chuckles. “We ended up in what would be California. My dad was going to dig for gold. However, he got sick one day. Not long after that, he died. Our house had already been raised, but to provide for me and herself my mom converted it into a general store of sorts. She served food, too, along with taking side jobs here and there mending and washing miners’ clothing. She’d collect the gold dust that got caught inside of pockets and whatnot and use that for money as well. By that time, I was old enough to help her.” “She sounds like an amazing woman. That couldn’t have been easy. And I’m sorry about your dad,” I tell him honestly. He kisses me then, just a chaste one. “It was a lifetime ago. My mom had a long life; there weren’t many times we went without, and people generally loved her. My only regret is that she gave up art for me, because of what she had to do after my dad died. I should have helped her more, given her more time to do what she loved,” he tells me with a hint of sadness in his voice. “I think she would have loved to know how good an artist you are now, and that you have your own galleries. I think she’d be proud.” I smile. He smiles back. “I think so, too.” He turns then, bringing his lean body over mine and settling himself between my legs. Just the brush of his hardness touching my sensitive skin has my blood on fire. Reed’s soft lips brush mine and I open for him, needing to taste him. His tongue dances around mine as one of his hands fists in my hair at the back of my neck, the other lightly tracing my outer thigh. I comb his hair back with my fingers, one hand sliding down his back. The warm, silky skin and feel of his shoulder blades makes me arch up with my hips, wanting to feel him inside me. At the move, Reed pulls back. He loves to take his time caressing me, both with hands and his mouth. His lips skim over my jaw, moving down the column of my throat before I feel the first lick, sending lightning straight to my core. I moan his name, making him chuckle darkly against my collarbone. “Not yet, beautiful.” He licks all the way down to my nipple, elicting another moan from me before pulling the tight bud into his mouth. His hand at my hair slides around to play with the underside of my other breast, driving me crazy. I run the heel of my foot up his thigh, pressing it into his backside, knowing that drives him crazy. I smile at his groan of pleasure. Sure enough, he rocks his length into me. Just what I wanted. “You play dirty,” he pants through a smile. “Only fighting fair, handsome,” I tell him as I repeat the move with my other foot. The position leaves my thighs open wide, driving home exactly what I’m wanting. His hips thrust forward harder this time, the full and heavy length of him sliding through my slick core. This time we both moan. He repeats the action a few times with purpose. Once I think I’ve won, though, he slides his body down mine, giving my inner thigh a teasing bite and nearly making me growl in unexpected pleasure. Then, he starts. That sinfully amazing tongue of his flicks out to play with my most sensitive flesh, licking and swirling, dipping inside of me over and over again. As sweat forms on my body, and as I’m about to fall over that blissful edge, he repositions himself at my entrance and drives me to ecstasy in one hard thrust of his hips. I call out his name, rocking my hips in time with his as one hand feels his abs flexing and the other holds him to me by his hair. He’s all that grounds me now. My body feels like it’s floating, chasing the last few moments of electricity pulsing through me and around him. He soon finds his release inside me, my favorite part—when I can feel him pulse and the warmth floods me. “Only a woman with eight bed partners wakes up looking that tired. Come here, you ravenous little thing.” Logan greets me after a much-needed shower and dressing in yoga pants and a one-shouldered sweater. “Good morning to you, too.” I blush even though I roll my eyes at him. He pulls me down on the couch next to him, letting me snuggle into his side. He kind of has a point, though. I could use a nap already. Reed, though, looks as if our morning romp has actually given him energy. So not fair. “So, what are the plans for today? Anything interesting?” Reed asks as he picks through a bowl of fruit and some other platters left out on the coffee table. He makes a small plate of strawberries, cheese, and sliced French bread and hands it to me before going back for himself. I thank him with a smile for his thoughtfulness. Logan shrugs beside me. “Not really. Remy wanted us both to meet up with him and the others at some point today. He took Mikey and headed out to one of the construction sites early. Ash is doing training, and the others are all around here somewhere. Oh, but Marcus did come by a little bit ago to see Kitten.” He says the last to me. I nod that I heard him as I take a bite of bread and cheese. “And you?” Reed asks. “I’m torn between rounding up some of the wolves and taking them shopping and looking into fabrics to design clothes for our upcoming little one.” His foot taps the floor as he ponders. “You’re going to make clothes for the baby?” I gasp, more than a little surprised. He gives me a look like I’m crazy. “Duh.” He almost looks hurt. I shrug. “I didn’t know you made baby clothes.” “I didn’t. I don’t. But it’s a thought. I’d like to at least design a few things for our kid, though.” I beam at him. “That sounds wonderful, Logan.” “Why would you take some of the pack shopping?” Reed asks. “Ugh! Because this online shopping thing is for the birds! That’s why. A lot of the ones who lived in that god-forsaken nightmare out back don’t know their own sizes due to only wearing what was available. Now, though, they should be able to have some things that fit them properly…and that I like,” he tells us dramatically. “Remy most likely won’t want you to go, though,” Reed tells him. “Oh, yeah. That slipped my mind. Probably best if I don’t,” Logan agrees. I tilt my head at the two of them. “Why not?” Logan’s eyes shoot to Reed’s. They share a moment before Reed turns to me, a smile on his face, but it looks off. “Because we have to meet up with him and the others today, remember?” “Right,” Logan adds. He jumps up from the couch. “We should go get that out of the way.” Before I can ask why they’re acting strange, both of them have their backs to me as they walk toward the stairs. Boys. Weird. After finishing off my small plate of food, I fell asleep right where I sat. It was nearly noon when I woke back up again, but I was determined to accomplish more than eating and sleeping today. Readjusting my clothes back to rights I’m about to head down the stairs, when I scent Finn close by. He wasn’t in his room when I passed by, so, curious, I seek him out. I find him in one of the unused rooms on our floor. The door is shut, so I knock lightly before opening it. Peeking my head around the door, I see a slightly flustered Finn trying to shove papers into drawers. I tilt my head at him. “Sorry if I interrupted…” Dazzling green eyes meet mine, instantly losing the mild panic from a split second ago and softening into a different emotion. “Oh, it’s just you. You can come in, Kitten. I thought you might be Remington.” I raise a brow at him, a smile tugging at my lips. “And just what are we hiding from Remy?” Finn’s boyish grin lights up his whole face, his pinkening cheeks only adding to his appeal. “I’m not hiding anything. I was just working on something and it isn’t ready for him to see yet,” he explains. “Okay.” I shrug. As he pulls the crumpled papers back out of the desk, I walk behind his chair and place my arms around his neck. I bury my face in between his shoulder and chin, inhaling his unique scent. The only way to describe it would be that of vast, open spaces of rolling green hills. Closing my eyes for a moment, I bask in the calm strength that only this man can provide me. “This…” Finn mumbles quietly. “This?” I question as I open my eyes, letting my hands trail lightly over his narrow chest. His midnight hair tickles my cheek as he nods. “Yes, this. Little moments like this one…it’s what was missing before,” he explains. We share a smile of understanding before I kiss his pouty lips and move my hands to his shoulders. “Can I know what you’re working on?” I ask with a glance at the random-looking papers. “Uh, yeah, I guess. It’s just an idea. I don’t know if it will work, or if we even want it to.” He trails off, seeming to get lost in his thoughts. I walk around him and hop onto the edge of the desk. “So, what’s the idea?” He takes several minutes to respond, running his long fingers through that inky hair. “On the most basic level, it’s a school.” I chew my lip, nodding as I wait for him to add more. When he doesn’t, I press further. “A school for wolves like us?” “Maybe.” He sighs. “It’s just an idea. I’m trying to figure out a few things long-term for the pack. I feel like the changes we’ve made since being here are just temporary. Like band-aids. Necessary band-aids, but ones that won’t completely solve the problems.” “What problems are we trying to solve, exactly?” I ask, now more interested in this project than just a passing curiosity. “For starters, it could be a place for pack members to become educated, as any school’s purpose is. We are wolves that live as humans, so it stands to reason to be educated on both the wolf world and the human world. The school would solve the issues of pack members being left in the dark when it comes to their own histories. As well as them understanding human society well enough to blend in. Most of the wolves here have never stepped foot off of pack lands; they wouldn’t know the difference from a five-star restaurant and a post office.” “I know,” I whisper sadly. “The neglect shown to these people is overwhelming. I think I know why no one ever educated them on all things wolf, though.” Finn raises a brow at me. “Oh, really? Why is that?” “Probably because nobody knows. Which doesn’t make sense, I know, because everything I’ve read makes it seem like there have always been scientists and researchers and those who want to record our history. My guess is that those in charge hide whatever information they don’t want brought to light. I mean, how is it that no one can tell me why I exist? I can’t be the first of whatever I am.” “I agree with you, in part. Your own grandfather is known as Maksim the Great due to what humans would call an “Enlightenment Age”. I have no doubt that the science, research, and history are there. What any of the history books forget to mention is the why of how everything changed. It’s almost as if wolf society was advanced at one point, only to fall back into the Dark Ages where the answer for everything is magic.” “My guess would be The Suffering. When that took place, it seems as if everything shifted. New rules came forth, and whatever knowledge was common only became known to the few.” I shrug. I’ve read through the few books available here and facts seem to be far and few between, mostly written as opinion pieces. I know Finn had read them, too, probably coming to the same conclusion. “Your grandfather would know,” he hedges. I nod my head, biting at my lip. “I’ve thought of that, too. I just don’t know how to start that conversation. How does one simply ask, “You know all that information you’re hiding from everyone else? Yeah, I’m gonna need that.” Finn’s startled laughter makes me smile. “There are more subtle ways of beginning an uncomfortable dialogue, Kitten.” I just shrug. If there are, I don’t know them. “I still think anything he would tell us would just be more pack propaganda. The only way to get a full wolf history would be to ask all the wolves. Not just ones in our own pack.” Finn nods. “I agree. There needs to be an open information exchange amongst us all. That’s what I would want for the school. That wouldn’t happen overnight, though.” “No, but if anyone could make it happen it would be you. You could be the first person to map and record the entire wolf history,” I say brightly. “You think too highly of me.” He snorts. “I think you don’t think highly enough of yourself. If this is something you want to make happen, then you’ll make it happen. And I’ll help, if you want. We could start by documenting what we do know about wolves now. I think the hardest part of it all will be separating fact from fiction. Or better yet, science from magic. And let’s not forget that you and the others carry with you important information that no one has ever cared to document. The history of changed wolves.” Finn stares at me for a long time, his face held in wonder and contentment. I gaze back at him quietly, hoping to convey just how much I believe in him and his dreams. I don’t know what makes Finn shy, or why he second-guesses himself, but I decide right here and now to find out and build his confidence in himself. His cheeks pinken, realizing he’s been staring, and he clears his throat to hide unnecessary embarrassment. “We got off topic there.” “Just a bit.” I giggle. “Do you want to tell me more about this school you’re thinking about?”
Chapter Three
Chapter Three I peek around the corner, scanning the room quickly. No sign of the enemy. I roll my eyes, about ready to give up and start wondering why I’m so bad at this game, when I remember to use my wolf senses. Duh, Kitten. I hate trying to sniff the air, as absolutely everything has a scent and it can be overwhelming, but I’ve been practicing with my advanced hearing. I listen for the telltale pattering of heartbeats and follow the one I detect hiding behind the curtain. A giggle escapes me as the excitement of the chase is just too much to contain any longer. A squealing peal of laughter is all the warning I get before Mikey, dressed head to toe in ninja black, shoots out from behind the curtain and high-tails it out of the room. I laugh fully now, giving chase and dashing down the hallway while trying to avoid running into the few people walking about. For a young thing, he sure is agile. It’s not until he slows to make the turn into the kitchen that I have the opportunity to catch up with him. We’re both laughing way too hard as I grab him around his waist and start tickling him senseless. We end up falling to the floor in a tangle of limbs, with me trying to find his most ticklish spots and him trying to escape me. I know we’ve caught the attention of several people, but I’m not ready to give up until Mikey tells me where his accomplices are hiding. “Just tell me where they are and this can all be over!” I manage through laughter as I aim for the pits. “Never!” he squeals back. “I got twenty on Kitten.” Tristan’s voice floats to my ears. “Nah, the kid is squirmy. It’s like trying to wrestle an alligator.” Logan takes his bet. Their banter gets my attention and I glance over, spotting Logan atop the counter, popping grapes into his mouth as Tristan leans next to him, catching the ones he drops. They both watch with amused grins. Unfortunately for me, Mikey takes advantage of my distraction and hops up faster than a bunny on crack. “Ha! You’ll never take me alive!” he shouts at the top of his lungs as he makes his escape. “No fair!” I call after him. “They distracted me.” Turning back to the guys, I point an accusing finger at them both. “You distracted me. Whose side are you on anyway?” Tristan just shakes his head as Logan makes a face, sticking his tongue out. I get back to my feet and race down the hallway to where I think Mikey has run off to. As I’m approaching the corner my shoulder bumps into something hard, and I let out a squeak as time slows down in that odd way that only happens when you’re falling. Strong arms wrap around me and catch me right before my face makes impact with the floor. I’m lifted up and set to rights, but before I can say thank you a pair of angry, liquid-silver eyes are right in front of me. “What are you doing?” Remy booms at me, making me take a step away from him. “You can’t be running around that fast. You could have gotten hurt! The baby could have gotten hurt! You can’t just…” He trails off as he closes his eyes on a deep inhale, fists clenching at his sides. “Ah, so it’s been confirmed then. I’ll try not to take it personally that none of you have reached out to me to share the news. Or the fact that there was no ceremony for the pack’s sake.” Grandfather’s Russian accent slips out as he makes it known he’s none too pleased to be informed of the news in such an informal manner. I take my eyes off Remy for a split second to see that he was in the company of Maksim and Albert. “I-I was playing hide and go peek,” I stutter an explanation. “Well, don’t!” Remy barks at me. He appears to have calmed himself. A little. I purse my lips at him, hands already sliding to my hips. “I will if I want to. I don’t need your permission to play a game.” “Do you realize what could have just happened?” he says in a softer voice, though I can still sense his anger. “Um, I could have fallen?” I stare at him confusedly. “I was doing fine before you appeared out of nowhere. Maybe I should get you a bell or something.” I say with a smirk, remembering the first time I ran into him. Silver eyes widen as his mouth drops open. “Are…are you blaming me for what just happened?” “Now, now, children. Let’s not fuss over what could have been and point fingers. The matter was handled.” Grandfather steps between us and slides an arm around my shoulders, ushering me back down the way I came. “Albert, why don’t you run ahead and see to it that the sitting room is suitable for a private chat?” I look back over my shoulder at Remy as Albert moves past us. He looks like he’s cooled off now, and I can’t help but stick my tongue out at him playfully. His eyes narrow heatedly in response and he mouths the word “Later” at me. I clear my throat and move out of Grandfather’s hold as my cheeks turn pink. A satisfied-sounding grunt from behind me reaches my ears, but I choose to ignore it. We pass by the kitchen. Both Tristan and Logan are singing “Kitten got in trouble” in a sing-song tone before Remy shushes them with a look. “Hey, can one of you guys go tell the boys I can’t play right now?” I ask. “Sure thing, Pretty Girl,” Logan tells me, kissing my forehead and sauntering off. Tristan chooses to join our little group and it appears as though Jace will be here for it as well, as he’s conversing quietly with Albert in the sitting room when we come in. I approach my golden boy with a smile already tilting my lips, but as I near them his golden eyes flash to me and his whole body goes rigid. Turning to Albert he speaks formally and sharply. “Find me later, Albert. I have to figure this out before it drives me insane.” As Jace passes by me he nods his head but doesn’t so much as say hello. “Of course, Alpha Jace,” Albert replies. Jace stops dead in his tracks in the doorway, his skin rippling as he tries to control his wolf. “Don’t call me that! I can’t stand this shit!” He throws his hands out to his sides, stomping away from us. I blink at the empty doorframe in shock. What was that about? Now that I’m thinking about it, I realize it has been a while since I’ve had a real conversation with Jace. He’s been sleeping in later than the rest of us and I had just assumed he’s been busy. But now…I wonder if he’s been avoiding me. I finally turn my eyes to the rest of the room and silver orbs are waiting. Remy shares a look that tells me that we’ll figure out what’s going on with Jace. Together. Grandfather clears his throat in an attempt to get us back on track and say whatever he brought us here to say. “Well now, look at you! Already glowing. I had my suspicions, but I was waiting for your mates to catch on,” Grandfather jokes. His powerful arms go around my shoulders as he pulls me into a warm hug. “Congratulations, my dear. With this child, you will secure your mate’s place as alpha and ensure the Ivaskov line continues.” He beams at me as he pulls away. “Yes, Princess. The news of an heir and our future, rightful Alpha is most welcome news,” Albert adds. “Uhhh, thanks?” I’m not sure what the right response is here. “It would be a good move to announce this news to the pack as soon as possible. I’ll need to set up a receiving line after the announcement, and correspondence will need to be sent to the other packs. While some may take offense to your mates, none will challenge the legitimacy of an Ivaskov heir.” Albert takes out a notepad and pen and starts making a list. My eyes connect with Remy’s as my earlier shock of two minutes ago fades, and a dismaying weight of something unnamable fills my chest. “Come, Granddaughter, let us sit for a moment.” Maksim leads me to the small two-seater couch as everyone else finds somewhere to sit or lean. A moment later, Logan returns and quietly sits next to Tristan. Maksim takes my hands in his, effectively turning my body towards him. Eyes so much like my own implore me to hear him out. “You might want to take this time to consider young Michael’s position within the pack. I know you are fond of the boy, but the wolves won’t like their future alpha having competition. Especially from a human child, and one not of royal blood. His title may need a bit of…fine tuning.” And there it is…the reason my blood had turned to ice. I guess I should have seen this coming. “His position in the pack is my son. That’s not for anyone to question or challenge. He’ll be a brother to any other children I have,” I state firmly. Maksim sighs deeply. “Can you just, for one moment, try to see things from a wolf’s perspective?” “That’s hardly fair.” Tristan speaks up, offended on my behalf. Maksim raises a hand to stop any other protests. “I am aware of Kitten’s past and the fact that it is not her fault she wasn’t raised to be who she has become. I just want you to understand that you now have a child that you are claiming as your own, who will be older than any other children you have. In effect, a first-born son who is now known as Michael Ivaskov. As in, it appears to others you have named him after your father and a beloved Alpha.” “But I didn’t name him.” I say in a duh tone. “He’s nine and already had a name. All of us took the Ivaskov name when we came here. You told us to,” I remind him. “Yes, and I understand that.” Maksim nods slowly. “However, others will not. Do remember that I had two sons once, two brothers. One was born to be Alpha, the other was never considered. Does that sound familiar to you?” His pale green eyes narrow on mine, crinkling in the corners. I can tell this is a hard subject for him, even if I want to hate him for what he’s asking me to do. “It does, and I understand where you’re coming from,” I say as gently as I can, patting his hand awkwardly. “But I will never abandon Mikey. Not physically, emotionally, or even in title. He’s my family now. He’s mine in any way that counts. If I’m to be princess, then he’s to be my little prince. If and when I have another son, maybe a future Alpha, then the boys will have to work out their issues as all brothers do. I hope what happened to your sons doesn’t happen to mine, but I refuse to put such a separation between them for the sake of what might happen.” He pulls his hands from mine and stands abruptly, choosing to pace the carpet in front of me. My eyes widen when he’s suddenly in my face. “You are so stubborn! Just like him!” The room explodes in point-two seconds. In a flash Maksim is across the room with a mad-as-hell Remy pinning him to the wall. Albert is holding out his notepad like a shield as he tries to placate the room of angry wolves. Logan stands fully in front of me, shouting expletives, and Tristan sits next to me, mumbling in that calming tone of his to soothe me. Well, I don’t need to be soothed. I stand up, displacing my wall of Logan to move around him. “Enough!” I shout, making the room quiet. “Remy, you can release him. He wasn’t threatening me, and he isn’t going to hurt me,” I say carefully. Something about telling Remy what to do never sits right with me, but I’ve learned that if I ask instead it makes it easier. To my relief he releases the older man, but he doesn’t allow him to move away from the wall. Good enough. I move to get closer to them, still staying slightly behind Remy so he doesn’t become angered again. “Maksim…Grandfather. I know that, while your words might sound harsh and calculating, you are actually trying to help me. I know you feel guilty for what happened with both of your sons, and are trying to save me from that fate.” I pause so that my mates present can let that sink in. I had first thought the same as them, that an old Alpha didn’t want a non-Ivaskov on the Ivaskov throne. But the truth was in his eyes. The pain of losing two sons, one in cold-blooded murder and the other to corruption. I’m not even a real mom yet and I can’t imagine surviving that. I looking my grandfather dead in the eye, I continue. “But we won’t allow that to happen with my sons, your great-grandsons. We learn from the past so that we may have a better future, right? And I’ll be here, and my mates will be here. And you’ll be here for the boys, too. If we all work together to make sure that hate and jealousy don’t fester and grow between them, then they don’t stand a chance, right?” I try to smile and add levity to the situation. It probably comes off as more of a grimace. Something must have worked because I can almost feel the tension leaving the room. Grandfather wipes under his eyes before clearing his throat in that manly way of his. He comes to me, kissing the top of my head and offering a shaky smile before exiting the room with his shoulders back and his head held high. “Well, that was impressive. Sometimes I wonder…” Albert trials off with a shake of his head and a curious grin. “What do mean? You wonder what?” Tristan asks as he stretches out on the small couch comically. His long legs hang off the end, but he seems quite content. Albert blinks at us, having obviously forgotten we were still in the room or something. He adjusts his glasses and straightens his already-straight tie. “Oh, nothing. It’s just a thought I’ve had for a while.” “Would you care to share this thought?” Remy drawls out, sending a suspicious glance in the Omega’s direction. Albert’s eyes meet mine and pin me in place. “I think that’s a conversation I should have with our princess first.” My face contorts in confusion. “Uh, I’m just going to tell them what you tell me,” I admit with no shame. Surely, he knows that. Albert’s eyes flit nervously about the room, traveling from each of my mates. “How about just the three of us for now? Would that help?” Remy throws out. Albert relaxes slightly, but still doesn’t seem happy about it. Logan snorts in amusement. “I think that’s our cue, homie,” he says to Tristan. They each offer pecks on my cheeks before making their way out. Remy comes to sit beside me, laying his arm on the back of the couch behind me. I scoot closer, loving the warmth radiating off him. Albert remains standing, too nervous to sit it seems as he paces back and forth in front of us. “Princess, can I ask you a question first?” I nod my head. “Who is the Alpha?” “In my family or the pack?” I respond quickly. Albert instantly stops his pacing to stare hard at me. I can feel Remy staring at the side of my head as well. “Ah, see, they’re supposed to be one and the same,” he states, like that was his point all along. “Well, they are the same. Sort of. I mean, Remy is the Alpha in our family. He always has been, way before I came along. And he and my other mates are the Alphas of our pack.” The room stays silent for too long, in my opinion. Thankfully Remy thinks so, too. “What does this have to do with what you wanted to speak to Kitten about?” “You see, I have this theory. Actually, I’ve had this theory ever since I officially met the young princess, and I’ve been seeing evidence of this theory’s truth. But none more so than just a few moments ago.” “And what truth is that?” Remy almost growls. I understand his frustration. Sometimes it’s like pulling teeth to get information out of Albert. I wonder if it’s an Omega thing. “That which makes Kitten different, or special, also makes her an Alpha.” Albert pauses to let that sink in. “I thought females couldn’t be Alphas. Or that natural wolves were born Alphas or something,” I state. Albert nods. “Yes, in every case before you a male has been born with the rank of Alpha. I’ve been watching you from the beginning. I’ve seen how the pack responds to you, how I respond to you. Your mate situation is a unique one, which made me think any confusion I had on who was the true leader of this pack was due to that.” “But you’re saying that’s no longer the case?” Remy asks him. “I’m saying that Alphas are Alphas, leaders are leaders, and just because rules and laws say one thing doesn’t change that fact. Kitten sees you as her Alpha. Whether you were born a wolf or not, it’s who you are. My theory is that the two of you are an Alpha pair.” “Is that even a thing?” I ask. I’ve read the books around here on wolves and wolf history. An Alpha pair was never mentioned. “It’s not, no. Females have never taken on a leadership role in a pack before. But you’re different. From the start you’ve made it your mission to help this pack, and it’s no longer because you’re the only one in your family to have the Ivaskov name. All of your mates now have the name and power that comes with it. Even now you could sit back and allow them to lead us all, but you won’t.” “Ugh!” I groan in frustration. “See? This is what I was talking to Finn about the other day. Your rules change too often, so no one knows what’s true and false. You’re all operating on hearsay and old wives’ tales, but none of you have been told the same things.” I wipe a hand down my face. It’s pure craziness. “As I said, it’s just a theory of mine.” “What exactly do you expect us to do with this? Wouldn’t this pack, and every other, rebel against the thought of a female in charge?” Remy questions. Albert shrugs a lean shoulder. “I don’t expect you to do anything. I just thought you should know what I’ve noticed. The princess just took an old Alpha with control issues, and not only put him in place but gave him a lifelong purpose. Maksim will now make it his mission to make sure your sons will not end up like his. Also, as the Omega of this pack, my loyalties and wolf stay firmly with the Alpha. I hope it does not displease you to learn that I feel no strong pull towards your other mates, but I do feel equally drawn to you and the princess.” I share a look with Remy, but once again I know we will be talking about this in private. Now’s not the time. However, Albert continues. “I realize this is something to think about and talk about with your other mates. I would like the two of you to consider taking on the role of an Alpha pair, and your other mates as Betas. I think it would do well in putting the pack at ease and giving them a very clear chain of command. Something this recovering pack could really use.” Albert bows low to the both of us, but I stop him mid-stride to the doorway. “Albert, if your loyalties lie with us, then why are you always with Grandfather?” I ask him. To my surprise, he laughs. “Because you will not allow me to be by your side. I’m sure you’re not aware of it, Princess, but you isolate yourself from everyone but your mates.” I blink a few times in shock at his retreating back. I frown and turn to Remy. “I do?” “Pretty much,” he answers with a raised eyebrow. “I thought you were doing it on purpose. Like Ash does.” “I’m always around people. When am I ever alone anymore?” I bite my lip, trying to figure out the answer to my own question. “He means the rest of the pack, not us or Mike,” he counters. “I’m around them. I mean…they’re around. I say hello to everyone!” I try to defend myself. “I know you do, Love,” Remy says gently as he tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. “As I said, I thought you were doing it on purpose. I see now that you were just unaware. You’re not used to being a part of a pack. Even with just us guys, it’s different because you’re our mate. You see, most packs are very close to one another. Even this one, with all its issues, is a very tight-knit community. They’ve looked out for each other as best they could. They were raised together, hunt together, eat together, and even relax with each other.” “But there’s so many of them! How am I supposed to do all of that with everyone all of the time?” I question. Remy shrugs. “I don’t think anyone expects you to be best friends with every single wolf here; you’re a princess after all. It wouldn’t do well to be too close to too many people, but I think they expected you to at least form a small group of close friends by now.” “Have you?” I ask him. “Have I what?” Remy answers, though the grin on his face lets me know he knows what I’m asking. I simply stare at him, awaiting his answer. “No, I haven’t gotten close to any of the pack members. I have my family as far as I’m concerned. There are many men I’ve grown to respect, and even a few I trust, but no one expects more than that from me.” I make a face at him. “Why do they expect it of me, then?” “Because you were meant to be raised with these wolves. These are your people; they always have been and always will be. They look at me and see a changed wolf that doesn’t belong, but when they see you, they see a wolf pup they should’ve been allowed to help raise. A best friend they should’ve had, a girl to spoil and play with, and a howl that should’ve joined their midnight melody for the past twenty-one years.” “You belong here,” I whisper quietly, buying time to let what he said play out in my head. The thought makes me sad, and I wonder if the other wolves are sad, too, about all we’ve apparently missed. Remy leans over to kiss the top of my head. “They accept me and the others because of you. But you’ve missed the point. My point was that, as much as these wolves belong to you and are yours, you belong to them and are theirs.” I nod my head in acceptance. “I get it. Do you think they’re angry with me for not befriending them?” I wonder. “I don’t know, Kitten. Probably not. My guess is that they’re just confused. You’ve already shown yourself to be a champion for them, and they love you for it. I’m guessing they can’t understand what it was like to grow up outside of the pack anymore than you can understand them growing up inside of it.” “You’re just full of wisdom today, aren’t you?” I say half-jokingly to lighten the mood. I don’t know what it is about today, but apparently it’s deep conversation day and I’ve been given way too much to think about already. “Guess what, Kitten?” Remy says after a long pause. “What?” I ask. “We’re all alone,” he says with a devilish grin, eyes filled with heat. “Hmm... I suppose we are. Just what do you plan to do about that, oh observant Alpha of mine?” I tease with a wide smile gracing my face. “First and foremost, I plan to get you behind a door that locks and then maybe I’ll give you that tongue-lashing you deserve.” A giggle escapes me as Remy picks me up in his strong arms, bridal style. As we enter the hallway and he makes his way briskly toward our floor, I wrap my arms around his neck and whisper in his ear, “Tongue-lashing, huh? I thought I only got those for being good.” A copper-colored eyebrow raises at my question. “Oh? And have we been bad, Kitten?” I bite my lip and nod slowly. “Very bad.” I answer, hoping I don’t sound like a dork and that he gets my meaning. I squeak in shock as Remy seems to miss a step, his arms tightening around me. Before I can react further, though, my legs are released momentarily only to have each thigh grabbed and parted around his waist as my back touches the wall. A deep rumble from within him vibrates my entire front, but it’s the intense pool of liquid silver in his eyes that makes me utterly melt inside. His rough, callused fingers brush my outer thigh, distracting me. “Are you sure? I know you’ve played to my brand of foreplay before, but you’ve never asked.” His deep, gravel-like voice is more of a purr as he leaves his statement open for an answer. His firm lips trail lightly up the delicate column of my throat, causing my breath to hitch and my nails to dig into his shoulders. “I like it,” I tell him honestly. He grinds his hips into me, hard, before pulling back. Oh, I like that. “I like seeing you dominant, and powerful, and in control.” He does it again, making me pause to catch my breath, as it’s coming faster now. “Only to lose every ounce of that control at the end…with me…to me…in me.” “Fuuuuck,” he growls in my ear. “You are exquisite for a man’s ego. Last chance, Love. You sure you want to play?” “More than anything,” I respond quickly, meeting his eyes with determination. Remy keeps me wrapped around him as he pulls us away from the wall, probably to hide his noticeable excitement from the onlookers who were casualties in our very public display. As caught up as I am in my Alpha, my hearing still picks up the comments. “Do you think she knows she’s giving off enough pheromones to knock a dude out?” “Her? Did you not feel how strong the pull from the Alpha was? Took everything in me not to submit and it wasn’t even directed at me.” “Cold showers for the whole house again, huh? We need more damn females around here. If the Alphas insist on putting that much orgy energy into the air, I demand a damn partner.” The last is met with agreement and laughter, and thankfully we’ve gone far enough up the stairs to be able to tune them all out. One step onto our floor and Remy’s lips attack mine. Hot, demanding, and as hard as the rest of him. His hands slip from my waist to my backside, squeezing pleasurably as he rocks me up and down his covered length. I release a growl of my own into his mouth, feeling frustrated at all these dang clothes between my mate and me. I gather the fabric of his shirt, ready to tear it open, but I’m stopped by one of his hands grabbing both of my wrists. I break away from the kiss to pout at him. “Tsk, tsk, naughty girl. You said you wanted to play, and when you play with me it’s always by my rules,” he taunts. “What game do you think they’re playing?” Tristan’s voice speaks up from behind me. “No clue, but it looks pretty fucking fun if you ask me.” Logan replies, sounding highly entertained. Twisting my head around as best I can, I see the two of them leaning against each side of the wall in the hallway where our bedrooms are. “Do you guys just lean on things all day, or what?” I joke, trying to hide my embarrassment. A quick kiss to one of them in front of the others is one thing, but I think it’s fairly clear what Remy and I are up to and I’ve tried not to rub anything in anyone’s face so far. “What do you say, Kitten? Up for a couple more playmates?” Remy asks before nipping at my collarbone. My mouth pops open in shock, surprised my Alpha wants to share. While I’m pretty sure he’s joking, I can’t help my body’s reaction to the thought. Between my nipples tightening painfully hard and squeezing my thighs to alleviate the throbbing of my core, I think I give myself away. Remy takes a deep breath, those silver orbs of his swirling with lust. “Do you boys smell that? I think our little mate likes the idea.” “Yeah, I do,” Tristan replies huskily while Logan nods, swallowing thickly. “My room,” Remy orders. My heartrate spikes when I see the two of them following behind us, Logan closing and locking the door, leaning against it. “Same rules apply to you guys: my game, my rules.” He tosses me roughly onto the bed, turning his attention to Logan and Tristan, getting their acknowledgement before continuing. They both seem nervous, clearly never being a part of Remy’s “games” before. I think I might pass out. No way is it healthy for one woman to be this excited. “Kitten, on your knees. There you go, now move closer to the end of the bed. You two stand on either side of me,” he instructs us. A small smile plays on my lips as I await my next order. “I want you to take off our shirts. Slowly, one by one. You can only touch the shirts, though, not us,” Remy tells me while smiling wickedly at me. How frustrating! He knows how much I like touching them. I do as I’m told, shuffling in front of Logan first. I meet his electric-blue eyes as I reach for the top button of his shirt. I pull it slightly away from him so I don’t accidentally touch, causing an amused smirk to take over his expression. I undo the buttons at the cuffs of each sleeve, then pull the fabric over his shoulders and down his arms. Goosebumps appear on his arms, making me feel amazingly confident. I have to pull his undershirt out of his pants where he had it tucked in, but I manage to remove that as well without touching his skin. I sigh sadly as my eyes rake over his gloriously smooth and tan chest, lightly defined abs, and slim waist. “Next,” Remy growls out, letting me know my little show is getting to him. In this moment, I feel powerful. I skip over Remy, moving over to Tristan. Remy’s eyes narrow roguishly at me and I stick my tongue out at him. Faster than my eyes can track it his hand snakes out, catching my jaw. He moves his face in front of mine, dancing his tongue along mine in one long stroke. “I’ve warned you once about that tongue of yours.” “Holy shit,” Tristan whispers heatedly. Remy releases me and I meet Tristan’s milk-chocolate eyes as I reach for the hem of his t-shirt. He has to bend down to help me get it over his head, but I manage to get the damn thing off. My fingers twitch with the need to touch his pecs. Oh, how I would love to lick that thin line of hair trailing from his bellybutton down into his jeans. It’s barely noticeable, a sandy color, just like the hair on his head. I hurry back to Remy, becoming impatient with this task and wanting to move onto the touching and being touched parts. I bite my lip hard enough to taste blood as I grab the hem of his shirt with both hands, pulling in different directions. I pull slowly, watching every inch of delectable skin on this mountain of a man as it becomes visible to my eyes. Finally, with a forceful yank, I get the material free from his arms and drop it to the floor. “Our turn.” Remy takes a step back, gesturing for me to stand before him. His hand comes up to cup my jaw. I lean into him, closing my eyes to enjoy the simple touch. “You’re such a sweet girl, aren’t you? Now, kiss Logan while we divest you of these clothes.” Logan’s hot lips close over mine, his tongue sweeping out to taste mine. I open for him, taking him into my mouth for a quick suck before chasing his retreating tongue with mine. At the same time I feel long, slim fingers dip into the waistband of my yoga pants and ease them down my legs. I continue my kiss with Logan as I dutifully step out of my pants. “Fuck me. She’s wearing red lace. Can we keep her in these for a while longer, Rem? She looks amazing in candy-apple red, doesn’t she?” Tristan asks as one of my feet is placed on his thigh as he kneels before me. I pull back from Logan to see what’s happening. Remy takes that moment to pull my sweater up over my head, revealing the matching red lace bra and fixing my hair so it’s behind me. Logan tilts my head to the side to get better access to my neck. “Of course, she does. She looks sexy in everything I put on her,” he says through nibbles behind my ear. Tristan places a kiss on my knee as my eyes track him, those chocolate eyes solely focused on the lace between my legs. His tongue slips out to taste the skin of my inner thigh and my knees nearly buckle. Remy chuckles heatedly as his fingers find my nipple through my bra, pinching just hard enough to make me moan. My eyes close for just a moment, my brain trying to process all the touching at once. However, they snap open quickly when I feel Tristan’s lips and nose trailing up my leg to where I want him most. Oh God, please let them touch me soon! I cry out in pleasure and shock when Tristan nuzzles my core through my panties. With a deep inhale followed by a long, slow lick, I fall back onto the bed like a heap of jelly. Three amused male chuckles meet my ears, making my face heat up. “Don’t ever be embarrassed, Kitten. That was hot to watch. Now, plant your feet on the bed and spread your knees for us. Show your mates how ready you are for us. I want to see how hot and wet that little pussy is getting.” I bite my lip and do as he asks. Even if he tells me not to be embarrassed, I do still feel shy. I think Remy likes making me blush, though. “I like the way you think, Rem. God damn, this is so fucking hot,” Logan pants. “Her panties are soaked. I think our girl is more than ready for us,” Tristan says as he strokes the material over my core. “Oh, I bet she is. Move those to the side, Tris. I bet a hundred dollars she’ll cream harder once she’s exposed fully to us. Won’t you, Kitten?” Remy challenges me with a smile as Tristan pulls my panties to the side. The weight of three pairs of eyes on my most sensitive skin is almost more than I can bare. I feel my core pulse hard as I whimper in need. “Please! One of you touch me,” I demand. “This isn’t fair. I need more,” I all but beg. Okay, so maybe I was totally begging. “Told you,” Remy says smugly to the guys. “But that’s not how I want to play this game,” he says to me. My eyes nearly pop out of my head in disbelief. He motions for Tristan to take a seat in the chair beside his bed as he orders me to my knees again. “Logan, what would you like from Kitten at this very moment?” he asks casually, as if he’s stating we might get rain today. Logan’s face shows his confusion as his eyes flit between the other two. “I…uh…I thought we were…What?” I’m so used to seeing Logan extra-confident and sure of himself, it’s almost cute seeing him like this. I don’t know if it’s because of what we’re doing or if it’s because Remy, his Alpha, is in control and in the room, but I decide to help him out. As lost as he looks right now, I know he’s turned on and excited to be playing with us in this way, too. Composing myself as much as my tightly-strung, jelly body will allow me I crawl my way back to Logan. Placing my arms around his neck I gaze up into his gorgeous face, my fingers brushing lightly at the chestnut strands at the back of his neck. “Remy is asking what you want to do to me next…or what you want me to do to you,” I say softly, creating the illusion of our own personal bubble. “This is meant to be fun and playful. You’re my king of fun, so I know there are plenty of things going on in that mischievous head of yours. I like doing this; it doesn’t feel bad or wrong to be intimate in this way. No one is going to make you feel bad or wrong for saying what you want. You have to trust that I’ll tell you if I don’t want to do something. And you should know me enough to know that I will,” I finish, hoping that the sincerity in my words is clear. Logan visibly relaxes, his hands coming forward to land on my hips, his thumbs caressing the dips on my sides. “I didn’t want to ask what you do with the others…or if it’s something you just don’t like doing…” “Tell her,” Remy commands. “If she doesn’t want to, she’ll tell you.” “Right,” Logan huffs. His hand reaches out to my face, his long fingers brushing over my parted lips. Instinctively, the tip of my tongue reaches out to taste him. Logan’s pupils dilate, a rush of air leaving him. “I want you to put me in your mouth, Pretty Girl. Please.” My eyes flit around the three of them, my face heating as I think I know what he wants me to do. Why couldn’t he ask me to do something I was good at! “I…uh. I would love to, Logan. But you see, I, umm…” I trail off. I can see the wall slamming down over his emotions and I panic, rushing to say what I need to before it’s too late. “I don’t know how,” I whisper, biting my lip and looking to the bedspread beneath me. A finger comes up to lift my chin, forcing my eyes to look at Remy. “As much as that information astonishes me, it also pleases me greatly. What better way to learn than with three of your mates, who probably enjoy different aspects of the act?” He turns to Logan, clapping him on the shoulder. “You’ll have to walk her through it. Praise her when she’s doing good, tell her to suck, lick, speed up, or slow down. She wants to please you, so tell her how so she learns.” Logan takes a minute to think about something before coming to some sort of internal decision. His hand shakes slightly as he reaches for his belt buckle, unfastening it and his zipper. He slides his jeans and boxer-briefs down, stepping out of them and kicking them free. He climbs up on the bed, shifting a pillow behind him as he spreads out from the top right corner to the bottom left corner. He gestures for my hand so I place mine in his, allowing him to guide me between his long legs. I sit on my knees, my butt resting on my heels. I take a minute to just enjoy the beauty of the man before me. Usually when the guys are intimate with me, we’re under blankets or we go from kissing to tearing each other’s clothes off. Now, though, I can see every inch of him. From his chestnut hair with the blue stripe slicked back, his blue eyes burning hotly, his pink, parted lips. My hands have a mind of their own as they glide up his strong thighs. I continue my perusal of my playful boy; his slim but defined chest has goosebumps forming, his tapered waist flexing his abs in excitement timed perfectly with the throbbing of his manhood. I sigh in appreciation. My curiosity gets the better of me as I gaze as his long, hard length. I notice the very top of it is shiny and wet. For some reason I want to touch it, so I do, sliding my thumb over the wetness and enjoying the feel. Logan sucks in a harsh breath. Remy comes up behind me, his hand rubbing my back. “You should see how it tastes. See if you like it.” I nod my head. That sounds like a good idea. Bringing my hand up to my mouth I cautiously lick at my thumb, my eyes snagging on Logan’s as I do so. The first lick has me curious, but there’s simply nothing to compare it to. I close my lips over my finger, sucking off the rest of the shiny fluid. Logan closes his eyes on a groan. “I don’t think I’m gonna make it. It’s even hotter knowing she doesn’t know how fucking sexy she’s being,” Tristan says from the chair as he stares at my lips, taking in the scene before him. Remy chuckles. “That’s not what I meant when I said you should taste it, you naughty girl, but what do you think?” I smack my lips together and tilt my head. “I like it. I mean I really like it. As in I want all of it now, but I don’t really know why I like it so much. It doesn’t taste like anything really, but it has its own taste and I know it’s Logan’s and I like that,” I ramble. “That’s instinct, Love. Now, put that pretty little mouth on your mate before he explodes,” Remy teases. I do as I’m told, placing my hand around the base, aiming it at my face. I lick up all the shiny stuff first, my tongue dancing around the tip. I’ve held my mates in my hands before, the hard yet impossibly soft skin never ceasing to fascinate me, but I have to say it’s a whole new level of amazing on my tongue. “You’re killing me, Pretty Girl,” Logan pants out. “Put your lips over me and suck gently.” I put him in my mouth, sucking lightly as he said to. Much to my delight, I get more shiny stuff. “Can you move your lips down, Kitten? That’s good…. fuck.” He trails off as his hand comes up to the side of my head, gently guiding me up and down on him. He keeps his thumb close to my lips, almost as if he wants to feel himself sliding in and out of me. Behind me Remy’s hands guide my body up, my butt now sticking up as he nudges my legs apart as far as Logan’s legs allow. He applies pressure to my lower back, making it arch. “Now that’s a fine fucking sight to see,” Tristan praises. I continue my slow stroking of Logan with my mouth as hands caress me from my knees up my inner thighs. Without warning, a hand lands harshly on my backside, making me both jump and moan around Logan, which makes him jerk his hips up toward my face. My eyes flare wide, the urge to gag rising up my throat, but I swallow, hard. How utterly embarrassing would it be to throw up right now? An odd thing happens then…instead of my swallowing forcing Logan out of me, it actually makes him slide deeper down my throat. I pull back immediately, panting for air and wondering what the hell just happened. I hear Remy chuckle as Logan’s worried eyes meet mine. “Don’t choke yourself, Kitten. Just take what you can. I want you to enjoy this, too.” I scrunch my face in confusion. “You mean that felt good to you?” I ask. To my horror, Tristan cracks up laughing. “You mean you deep-throating him? Yeah…I think it’s safe to say he enjoyed that.” I narrow my eyes at him. How am I supposed to know these things? How dare he laugh at me. I turn back to Logan, deciding to get my revenge on Tristan later. “If you liked it, I can try to do it on purpose. I just don’t want to throw up.” “Kitten, just know that it feels good no matter how much you take. If you’re determined to take it all, though, then you’ll have to learn the right moment to swallow, like you just did. Just don’t keep it in your throat for long, as it’s impossible to breathe. If you panic, you’ll throw up,” Remy instructs. Hmm. Challenge accepted. Time ticks by as I gradually take Logan deeper and deeper into my throat. Remy’s right about not being able to hold it there for long, but the pulsing and groans from Logan are worth every second. At first my throat burns, saliva gushing into my mouth at every attempt, but I learn that on the way up if I swallow again it creates that sucking motion that Logan likes so much. So, bonus! After a while Logan’s hips can’t seem to stay still, thrusting and twitching spasmodically as his breathing quickens. Remy warns me that Logan is about to come in my mouth and tells me I can either pull away or swallow it. It’s my choice. Before I can make up my mind Logan’s manhood expands even more, pulsing with his release. I quickly decide to see what it tastes like. If I don’t like it I can always spit it out, I guess. His warm cum coats my tongue, flooding my mouth. A sense of pride overcomes me. I did this to him. I made him give me of himself. I feel…powerful. As Logan begins to deflate, I continue to lick at him, wanting every bit of my prize for doing a good job. Once his breathing returns to normal and he seems to come to, he gently pulls me up his body by my arm, cradling me to his chest, his hand rubbing at the back of my head. “Thank you, Pretty Girl. That was amazing.” I lift my head to look at him, a wide smile on my face. “I love you, you know that?” he tells me before lifting his head to kiss at my temple. He falls back, utterly spent. I sit up to see a beaming Remington. He turns to Tristan, raising an eyebrow. “You’re up. What would you like from our sexy mate?” he asks him, reaching around to smack my bottom again. I moan at the contact. Only Remy could make something that’s supposed to hurt feel so good. Tristan leans back in his chair, stretching a leg out to prop one foot up on the bed. His hands go behind his head, his perfect Tristan smile coming out to shine. “Hmm, I think I’ll start with Kitten crawling over to me on her hands and knees, unbuckling my pants, and using that amazing mouth on me,” he says with a wink. Is Tristan ever not confident? I have to admit, I love that about him. His biceps are flexed in that position, leaving his bare chest open for my perusal, that thin trail of hair leading down to his obvious arousal. “You heard your mate. Go be a good girl and give him what he asks,” Remy whispers in my ear, making me shiver. He sucks at my neck for a moment, readjusting himself as he moves to sit on the bed. My eyes lock onto Tristan’s chocolate swirls, a smirk playing on my lips as I slowly crawl off the bed and nuzzle my face into his leg near his knee. I can’t wait to try out my new-found power on him. Remy once explained that in his games of dominance, it was I who actually had the power. He only had the power and control that I gave him. What I enjoyed most when we played was testing the level of trust that I gave him to pleasure both me and himself. I can now see how having such control over the situation can affect a person. Sliding my hands up Tristan’s covered thighs I reach up and free him, noting how he, too, has shiny stuff covering the tip of him. I stroke him slowly, letting the slickness cover every inch of him. “Use your tongue first. Especially right here,” he tells me, pointing out a vein on the underside of him where the top meets the rest of him. I run my finger over it, watching him shudder. His smile never leaves his face, clearly enjoying himself. I make it my mission to wipe that smile off of his face, wanting to see him panting for breath, begging for me to help him find his release. I start with a long, slow lick at his base, moving up to the tip. I purposely avoid where he wanted me. I do it again on the other side, watching in delight as more shiny fluid seeps from the top. I swirl my tongue around in it before lightly pressing a kiss to him. He groans, his hips flexing. I pull back before he can push into my mouth, looking up at him with a devilish smirk of my own. Turning my head to the side I use my lips to create suction on the side of him, moving my head up and down. Every now and again I flick my tongue out, teasing that special, tender spot. After several minutes of this his hips refuse to stay still, and I can see beads of sweat form on his abdomen. He reaches down, replacing my hand at the base of himself, squeezing tightly. “Please, baby, suck me. I know I said to use your tongue, but a man can only take so much,” he tells me as he swallows thickly, his hand guiding my head into position. Mission “Make Tristan beg”? Accomplished! I form a tight ring with my lips, pushing my head down slowly, creating suction. I swallow as he approaches my throat, sliding down until my lips meet his neatly-trimmed groin. I back up even slower, able to suck harder in this direction. I feel his thighs lose some of their tension in relief. I make a loud popping sound as I pull off of him. I can tell how close he is to finishing, but I have other plans. With a smile, I sit back and turn my head toward Remy. “Is Logan asleep?” I ask casually, though it takes effort to control my breathing. Tristan swears, his head thumping back onto the chair. I suppress a giggle. Remy’s eyes light up, enjoying my teasing of his friend. “I believe so. He’ll most likely wake up soon.” “Hmm, that’s interesting. It’s usually me who falls asleep first. Logan likes to cuddle before falling asleep,” I tell him conversationally. “Kitten!” Tristan growls impatiently. “Yes, sweetie?” I inquire brightly, turning back to him. “Why are you torturing me?” he asks with a frown. I tap my lip with a finger, looking lost. “I don’t know, why were you laughing at me before?” “Ugh! That? Because it was cute of you, and Logan looked like his head exploded! I wasn’t laughing at you, just the situation,” he explains, clearly frustrated. I smirk at him again. “I guess you know not to do that anymore, huh?” I realize my mistake immediately. Those chocolate orbs burn brighter than ever before, his perfect smile tinged with dark intentions. How could I have forgotten that he’s Logan’s mischief-making partner-in-crime for a reason? And he’s not nearly as shy as Logan in the bedroom. Or shy at all, really. He slowly takes his eyes off me, turning to Remy. “I think it’s time for part two of what I want from Kitten. I’ll let you get started, Rem. Mind if she’s on all fours while you stand at the edge of the bed?” “Not at all. That position works perfectly for what I want to teach our girl,” Remy responds darkly, his time for control of me exciting him further. He gestures for me to hop back onto the bed, making sure my back is arched like how I had it earlier. The height of the bed puts me at just the right level for him as he stands in front of me, lowering his pants and freeing his magnificent manhood. It’s already aimed right at my lips, framed by those lovely V shapes of his abdominal muscles. I sigh wantonly. Even his cock is powerful. Remy lifts my chin, forcing my eyes away from the wonder in front of me. “I’m going to do something a little different. I want you to stay as still as you can, okay? I’m going to fuck your mouth. If I push too far, or hold you down for too long, you let me know. I do want you to gag sexily around me, but I don’t want you to be too uncomfortable. You understand?” His eyes bore into mine expectantly. He wants both reassurance that I’m up for this and that I’ll tell him if I want him to stop. I take a deep breath, holding his gaze. “I understand, Remington.” He guides himself to my lips, pressing gently in and out as he gathers my hair up in his hand. I suck lightly, waiting for what comes next. “You’re such a good girl, Kitten,” he praises breathily. My heart warms at the endearment. He continues his movements for a few minutes, letting my mouth wet his length entirely. I can tell he’s about to change it up when the hand at the crown of my head grips my hair tighter, pulling, but not too hard, and his other hand comes to rest under my chin. Both hands work to hold me in place as he pushes slowly, but further than before. I work to swallow him down, his larger size causing a slight burn in my throat. Unlike Logan and Tristan, Remy doesn’t immediately pull back out. His hips press forward, my nose buried into the base of him. A few seconds tick by and my throat convulses, seeking air. He pulls my mouth off him quickly. I take a deep breath, my lips coated with my own saliva, a string of it still attached to the tip of him. “How was that, Love? Think you can handle more?” I nod my head, my hand coming up to wipe away the spit. Remy stops me, though. “Leave it. It’s sexy. This time I want you to continuously swallow once I’ve pushed past your throat. Ready?” Instead of nodding again I open my mouth, locking my eyes onto his. “Such a good girl,” he growls, pushing in again, harder this time. My eyes water and this time I do gag, but nothing comes up. He does it a few more times, always letting me catch my breath before staying in my mouth for a few pumps, then sliding into my throat again—knowing the rhythm helps me know when to swallow, making the whole process easier. It’s definitely harder than just licking and sucking but it’s nothing I can’t handle, and I love the pleasure rolling off my Alpha in waves. Long, skilled fingers lightly touch my backside, drifting over first one cheek then the other. My body instantly ignites into flames. My mind has been occupied learning new tricks and trying to please my mates, but my body seems to have never lost focus on our own needs. Tristan plays with the sides of my panties, pulling them down a little then back up again. I groan in frustration around Remy. He sucks in a quick breath, biting his lip as he pushes into me harder. Okay…so the guys like it when I make noise with them in my mouth. Got it. I do it again just to test my theory. Remy holds me down on him, his head rolling back as his mouth goes slack. Yep, they like it. Tristan trails his lips over my exposed skin, his face nuzzling between my thighs. I hear him inhale deeply, a loud growl of pleasure leaving him on the exhale. Without warning, my panties are pulled tightly against me before tearing sounds in the room, and then they’re gone completely. “You won’t be needing these anymore,” his melodic voice sings smugly. My thoughts turn into a looping chant at that point. Please touch me, please touch me, please, for the love of all wolf gods touch me!” My mind blanks momentarily as I’m overloaded with sensation at the first touch of Tristan’s manhood against me. My hips move back, trying to get him inside me, but he moves away. If it wasn’t for Remy holding my head in place as he smoothly takes my throat, I’d yell at him. Instead of pushing into me Tristan teases by rubbing against my slick center, gently tapping my sensitive core with the head of himself. Now that…that makes me purr around Remy, who takes full advantage of it. After years, or minutes, or something, Tristan finally pushes into me, taking time to make sure I’m properly stretched and ready for him. He sets his rhythm in time with Remy’s pushing. Long, hard thrusts followed by a circular grinding against that bundle of nerves as Remy pushes deep, my moans of pleasure vibrating around him. They work together, building all three of us up till we’re riding the edge of the wave of pleasure, ready to crash and burn brilliantly. Remy is the first to peak, his thrusts gaining speed, becoming erratic before he swells in my mouth, pulsing my liquid prize onto my tongue. He thrusts slowly, but doesn’t stop until after he stops throbbing. As he pulls away Tristan increases his pace, our bodies pounding together harshly. He reaches up, gripping my shoulder for better leverage with one hand, the other digging into my hip hard enough to bruise. I can’t control the sounds I make as he rapidly slams into me. They boarder between a moan and a whimper, giving up all thought as electricity vibrates through my body, heating my blood as I’m pushed over the edge. Remy’s hands sneak under me, his thumbs and forefingers each tugging a nipple, extending my release and eliciting a shout of pleasure from me. Tristan swears under his breath, a continuous growl emitting from his chest as he uses my body to find his own release a few minutes later with a roar of satisfaction. He collapses onto me, pinning me under him. He continues to pulse inside me, flooding me with his heat. Our sweaty bodies stick together, but I love the feel of his weight pressing me into the bed. Remy lays on his side, facing me, with his head propped up on one hand. He pushes the wet strands of my hair away from my face, his eyes shinning with love and contentment. After a few minutes Tristan shoves himself up on shaky arms, making me wince as he leaves my body. My eyes close momentarily until I feel his fingers sliding through my wetness. My tender flesh protests as his fingers enter me before he starts a slow, massaging rhythm inside me, his palm laid flat against me, pushing in a light circle pattern. “Flip over for me, sweetie,” he instructs. “Mmm,” I respond, feeling too worn out to do anything. He laughs lightly, his mesmerizing voice washing over me like honey. “Just this one last thing, please. For me?” Damn that alluring voice of his. Remy helps me turn over, sliding one of my legs between his. Tristan slides my other leg up and out, leaving me completely exposed to the both of them. He continues his slow massage within me, his fingers dipping in and out, pausing to rub a sensitive spot inside me. When my eyes meet his he smiles at me, dipping in one last time then bringing his fingers up to my lips. He smears the slickness across my lips before I open for him. “That’s it, baby. Taste us together…damn, that’s hotter than I imagined it would be. Do you like it?” he asks huskily. I nod around his fingers, sucking the taste of us mixed together from them. He pulls his fingers away, going back to his massaging as his head lays heavily against my outstretched thigh. I close my eyes. Remy’s hand comes up to play with my breast as he, too, starts to become excited again. Tristan’s tongue joins his fingers, working in tandem to build me up once more. Sensation overload wreaks havoc throughout my body, but the guys pause in their ministrations before I can explode again. “Get that gorgeous ass up on Logan,” Remy demands, helping my jelly-body to crawl over to my sleeping mate and mount him. “That’s it, Love. Rub that wet pussy over his cock and wake him up,” he pants in my ear. Logan comes to on a growl, his hands gripping my waist tightly as he uses his hips to seat himself inside of me and push all the way in with a single thrust. “Oh, hell yes. This is how I wanna wake up from now on. Ride me, beautiful. Ride it like you fucking own it,” he orders through clenched teeth. Sweat slicks my body as I grind my hips into Logan in a harsh rhythm, chasing yet another orgasm. Tristan’s hands guide me to lean forward, taking one nipple into his mouth. His hands help rock my hips harder on his best friend. Remy opens his nightstand drawer, taking out what I know to be lubricant. He meets us back on the bed with the bottle, using it to coat his fingers before he rubs at my back, making his way down to my rear end. I suck in a harsh breath, my eyes flashing to his. “Just keep riding Logan. You’ll like this, I promise,” he tells me with a hot smirk on his face. Easing a finger into my behind, he bites his bottom lip when I arch back into him. He slides in and out, adding a second finger, which elicits a deep growl from my throat. It’s pleasure and pain and everything in between. “Jesus Christ, Remington,” Tristan exhales intensely as he watches the scene. “You’ll have to hold yourself back, take it slow. If you hurt her, I’ll hurt you,” Remy warns. I’m leaned even closer to Logan as Tristan covers me from behind. Remy pauses my hips momentarily as Tristan prods at my backside. I suck in a sharp breath, my eyes locking with Logan’s as we both feel the pressure of Tristan entering me slowly. “Fucking hell! Impossibly tight,” Logan pants, thrusting up into me as if he can’t wait any longer. “Agreed,” Tristan breathes on a whisper. “How do you feel?” Remy asks me, brushing my hair away from my face. “Full. And really, really needy,” I answer him honestly. I can’t handle the pressure without some kind of friction. Not waiting on them, I begin to rock my hips slowly. Onto Logan and off of Tristan, then back, just to do it all over again. I can’t even process thought right now, only need. My head sags onto Logan’s chest as both men take over, taking from me what they need for their own release. My eyes slide to Remington’s as he sits off to the side, his own hand stroking himself slowly as he watches us. He stares back, silver orbs raking my body from head to toe. I nearly black out when I orgasm, taking the other two with me as I pulse around them. I’m filled to nearly breaking as they swell inside me, filling me to the brim with shouts of male satisfaction. In a blink Remy removes me from my other mates, laying me on my back as he lifts my legs over his shoulders and shoves into me roughly. He takes me hard and fast, taking his own release quickly, losing control. His triumphant growl is the last thing I remember.
Chapter Four
Chapter Four “Fly free, little babies. Wherever you land is where you is meant to be!” I giggle as the tiny rocks filter through my hands as I spin round and round. I imagine that the rocks have little families and friends and me throwing them around helps them get back to them. I mean, how else would rocks travel around? I wince and grab at my tummy as it rolls around painfully. It groans angrily, so with a few pats I try to reassure it that Davis will be back soon. He had asked me to wait in this park while he went to work for a few hours. The sun has come up seven times now, but we’re in a new area and I don’t know how to find him. I’m afraid to leave, to seek out a restaurant or a grocery store with overflowing trash bins, because he could be back at any minute. Since I first met Davis I’ve felt a pull towards him, like something inside of me says that we’ll survive better if we’re with him. Right now, that same thing in me is saying that we should leave here. But I don’t want to leave Davis. Davis is sad and he’s lonely. Even if he won’t admit it. “Hey there!” a voice calls, startling me and making me drop my rocks. I dust my hands off, a quick glance showing a middle-aged man approaching me. I start to walk off like I didn’t hear him. “Whoa, whoa, slow down there, kiddo,” he says with a smile as he jogs, catching up to me. I take a few steps back, not liking how close he gets to me as he cuts me off. I blink up at him, wondering what he wants. Already, I don’t like this man. I don’t know why, but it’s in his eyes. Always in the eyes. “You all alone here?” he asks. I quickly shake my head, pointing to a random building across the street. “My dad works there, he said I could play. I should get back to check in, though,” I repeat what Davis told me to say anytime I was caught alone. The man’s smile suddenly looks different. My plastic bottle of water crunches as I grip it nervously. “How odd. I work in that building, too. What’s your dad’s name?” he challenges. “John,” I lie. “You know what? I do know him. He and I are great friends! Why don’t I take my great friend John’s daughter for some ice cream?” I shake my head, about to protest, when grabs at my arm, jerking me forward and whispers in my ear through his teeth. “If you put up a fight, I will have the cops over here so quick your head will spin. You and I both know you’re here by yourself. I’ve been watching you for days. Just come along with me and nothing bad will happen.” I don’t have time to respond as he starts leading me to the woods where running people go in the mornings. I start to cry, not liking this man and afraid. I hate being touched; why hasn’t he let go yet? “None of that now. All you have to do is talk to me, that’s all. I’ll even give you a whole twenty dollars!” he says excitedly as he leads us away from the main path and through some trees. All I have to do is talk to him? My gut tells me he’s lying. Why couldn’t he talk to me where we were? Where we stop isn’t much of a clearing, just a small space where a large rock makes it impossible for trees to grow. As I look around, I notice that I can’t see or hear any people; there’s nothing but us and the trees. He sits down, dragging me down to sit beside him. His hand moves to my wrist, a gentle reminder that he’s not going to let me leave. Bite. Run. “So, tell me, girl. Why did you run away from home?” “I-I didn’t.” His free hand comes around to rub my hair. “Sure you did. Stop lying. Was it because daddy touched you in bad places?” “Bad places? No. I didn’t…” I respond, confused. Bite. Him. “You can tell me. I won’t tell anybody.” “I don’t want to be here!” I yank my arm away and try to stand. He pulls me back toward him. “No one touched me anywhere, I don’t know what you mean!” I yell, now trying to kick him away. I jolt awake as a shout reaches my ears. My eyes fly open, my heart racing both from the dream and from the feeling of danger at the shout. “Have you lost your ever-loving mind? What in the actual fuck is wrong with you!” a sleep-mussed Logan shouts at a distraught looking Jace. I calm slightly as I realize that there’s no cause for panic. “What’s going on?” I ask through a yawn. “Yeah, Jace. What’s going on?” Ash growls from the open doorway. His dark eyes scan the room for danger, his fists clenching at his sides. “I heard you scream Kitten’s name like she was about to fall from a cliff.” The three of us stare at Jace, waiting for an explanation. His golden eyes are filled with pain and worry as he paces at the foot of the bed. “I…just thought it was time she woke up.” He shrugs a shoulder, crossing his arms over his chest. “Lie,” Tristan accuses, coming up behind Ash. “You know what? Fuck it. Sleep the day away, see if I care.” He throws his hands up before stomping from the room. Ash’s eyes narrow on his retreating back before he follows quickly on his heels. I frown as I look to Tristan. “He was lying about wanting me to wake up, or lying about why he woke me up?” I try to wrap my tired brain around everything that just happened twenty seconds into waking up. Tristan shakes his head with a sad smile. He crosses the room to the bed, coming over to give me a hug. As he pulls away, he puts his face right in front of mine. “The real question is why he feels the need to lie to us in the first place.” * * * Ash That’s it. I’ve had it with this shit. “Remington!” I bark out angrily. Jace pauses ahead of me, turning to send a nasty glare in my direction. “That’s right, you little fucker, house meeting time. Whatever’s going on with you ends today.” He sneers at me. “You can’t make me do anything, Ash. It’s my business; why don’t you mind your own.” “Your business is my business. Or have you forgotten that, brother?” I growl at him. This place is fucking cursed. Everything is wrong. We’re not who we used to be. “Ash?” Rem questions, opening his bedroom door. “What’s going on?” I point an accusing finger at him. “Apparently, a fuck ton. I’m tired of this shit, Rem. Either you fix it or I’m pulling us all the hell out of here, kicking and screaming if I have to.” “God, you’re such a drama queen,” Jace chimes in under his breath. I snap. In two seconds I have the golden boy pinned to the floor, my fist connecting with his jaw. Shouts reverberate around us as he smirks up at me, blood coating his lips. I growl in his face before releasing him to stand. Fighting someone who isn’t fighting back irritates me, and he knows it. “You need to calm down,” Tristan tells me calmly, his palms out. I flick him off as I pull a face. “I’m as calm as I’m gonna get. Now get your asses in the living room for a meeting before I put your asses there,” I throw out as I stomp the rest of the way to the living room. They have three fucking seconds before I really lose my shit. Luckily for them, they pull the remaining guys together and find places around the room quickly. “Where’s Kitten?” I ask. “She wanted a shower to help her wake up,” Logan replies. “Depending on what this is about, that may be a good thing. I’m grateful we’ve finally managed to get everyone together, but I’m not sure why theatrics were necessary. Someone better start talking,” Remy tells us. I snort in disgust. “Talk to the duke’s son.” Remy looks to Jace, taking in his appearance and defensive stance. He sighs. “We’ll get to that. Kitten and I were going to have a discussion with him about what’s been bothering him. Obviously, you have some things you’d like to get off your chest first, though,” he says to me. “How about we start with why the three of you were going to have a conversation that concerns us all? Or about why it took so long for the eight of us to sit down together? Better yet, let’s talk about how we’re all so busy with nonsense tasks that we forgot how to be a FUCKING FAMILY!” I shout in his face. “We knew there would be changes when we agreed to come here…” he starts. “Yeah, we agreed to help a pack of dipshits get their act together enough to deserve our girl.” “Uhh, dude, I don’t know where you got that idea from, but that’s not what we agreed to,” Reed chimes, sounding confused. “I don’t know what the rest of you had in your heads, but I was under the impression shit was fucked up here and we were going to show them how to live as we do. Instead, here we are, acting like them. Following their rules. Tell me, Reed, when’s the last time you picked up a paintbrush? And Remington, tell me how it is that you’ve gone from millionaire architect to a fucking laborer?” “Live as we do?” Finn asks for clarification. “Yeah. Peace, togetherness, harmony. We had our issues, but we handled them. What we couldn’t handle ourselves, we trusted our Alpha to settle. Now, we pass by each other like strangers. Tristen is in the kitchens with one set of wolves, Remy’s building houses like that solves shit or something, Finn is a ten-time Harvard grad teaching algebra. Logan is a personal shopper, Kellan treats colds and fleas, and who the hell knows what Jace even does! All you do all day is shop online. Congrats, you’re a Real Housewife of Wolf County.” “I didn’t know you felt this way,” Remy says as he thinks it over. I turn and punch the wall, making a hole in the plaster. I’m beyond frustrated. “Me feeling this way isn’t the problem. I can handle it. What I can’t handle, and what I can’t understand, is why the rest of you don’t feel this way.” I turn to Rem, the fight leaving me. “I know Kitten getting kidnapped messed with your head, and I’ve tried to be patient. I’ve been waiting for you to pull your shit together and fix this. Don’t you see how close we are to losing everything that we’ve built?” His eyes flash in anger. “What would you have me do, Ash? Hmm? We built our own pack from scratch. We chose our own members, made our own rules, created our own history, and lived our lives how we wanted. How’s that supposed to work here? Half of these people I wouldn’t spit on if they were on fire. That army you train is a fucking joke no matter how you slice it, these people will never make enough money or food to support themselves, and I’ve got a pregnant mate that I hardly ever see outside of a bedroom! So, tell me, great wise one, what the fuck do you want me to do!” There’s a long pause that follows his outburst. Understandable, considering shit must be bad if Remington feels lost. Yep, this place is cursed. “I’ve been working on that,” Finn says quietly. He squirms in place when we all turn to look at him. “It’s not a perfect plan, and I haven’t figured everything out yet, but it could be a long-term solution. I’d like to work on it more before we really get into it, but what Remy said was true. This pack isn’t really a pack. It’s a bunch of scared wolves that don’t know any other way. What I have in mind is a complete reboot, a break the system kind of thing, if you will.” “Thank you, Finn. I look forward to hearing all about it. When you’re ready, of course,” Remy manages much more calmly. “If we’re done with the yelling portion of our meeting, I’d really like to take time and have a proper discussion as a family. I think we should all catch up with one another and air any griefs or feelings we’ve got going on. Lord knows if our normally silent and broody brother had that much to say, then there’s sure to be plenty from the rest of us,” he jokes, lightening the mood. I roll my eyes at the nickname. Just because I’m not a blabbermouth like some of the other guys doesn’t mean I brood. I don’t brood. I break the awkward silence that follows, nobody else knowing where to start. “This declaration of war on us has been a joke so far. They’ve sent scouts and small tactical teams, but nothing that couldn’t be handled easily. It makes me wonder if they’re waiting for something to make a real show of force, or if war means something else entirely around here.” “I’ve met with both Marcus and Albert about this briefly, but they seem more concerned with making sure the army is ready for a fight. Albert has suggested that we use Kitten to reach out on the political front, due to all of us being changed wolves. In his opinion, that’s what all of this is about—us opening our doors for other changed wolves. To other packs it might seem like we’re attempting to build an indestructible army,” Remington explains with an eyeroll. Reed sits forward, ticking items off on his fingers. “One, Kitten doesn’t even know about the war. Two, we are an indestructible army, just the eight of us. Three, we’ve made no move toward any other pack, aggressive or otherwise. I don’t even know why they fight each other. This isn’t the old days where everyone fought for territory.” “I think we should hold off on telling Kitten still. She’s in the beginning of her pregnancy, a fragile time for her,” Kellan adds his opinion. Remy nods in agreement. “Have you gotten a chance to examine her yet? Make sure both she and the baby are healthy?” Kellan frowns hard. “No, not yet. There’s a virus going around the pack that’s been keeping me busy, and I don’t really want to bring her into that cesspool until it clears up. From everything I can see without the use of an ultrasound, everything seems to be going normally. A lot of tests I would run for a human female wouldn’t apply to Kitten, so I’m going to need time to speak with some of the midwives who have dealt with wolf pregnancies before.” “We also need time to sit down and go over a budget. I don’t think anyone realizes how fast the funds are draining, now that the entire pack is being cared for,” Jace points out. Remy scrubs a hand down his face. “I think we’re going to have to make a schedule for everyone, including Kitten. I’ll start one after we’re done here, so you guys will have to let me know any times you want blocked off. But this reminds me of something else I’ve been meaning to bring up…” He trails off, thinking carefully how to word what he wants to say. “Everyone answers at once, first thing that comes to your mind. Who is the Alpha?” he asks, grey eyes scanning the room. “Of the pack?” Kellan replies, everyone else waiting for the answer before replying. “Fuck,” Rem groans, leaning his head back against the wall. “Same as Kitten. Okay, so, raise your hand if you don’t want to be an Alpha to the Ivaskov pack,” he instructs. Immediately, six hands shoot into the air. Turning to me, he raises an eyebrow. I give him a duh look. I’d rather chew off my own arm than play political puppet and get bugged repeatedly about dipshit matters. Leadership has always been Remington’s thing. When someone needs their head smashed in or to be taught a lesson…well, that’s my thing. “The reason I ask, is because it was brought to my attention that this pack could use stability, and that it somehow involves only answering to one Alpha. That being said, I was also informed that Kitten is Alpha material herself, though she sees me as her Alpha.” “What the fuck does any of that actually mean?” Logan asks. Before Remy can reply, Finn steps in. “This might be a good time to restructure and install a new form of government. A key to instilling a sense of real change, and breaking away from how things have been done in the past.” “What do you suggest?” Remy crosses his arms, waiting. Finn looks uncomfortable with all the attention on him again, but shakes it off. “I think removing all responsibilities from the rest of us at this point would make us appear weak, but I agree with having one Alpha. Honestly, every time someone said Alpha, I would look around for you.” “For Kitten’s part,” he continues, “I, too, think that she was born to lead. No matter if it’s a pack of wolves or a playground sandbox. However, I think her title needs a different name. Not only do all born wolves think of a male at the term Alpha, but a separate title would help differentiate between the two of you as well. Think in terms of kings and queens; sometimes they ruled together, sometimes a king, sometimes a queen, but the power of either title garnered the right amount of respect and labeled them as leaders.” “I could see that. I’m good with it. What would we call her?” I ask. “Oh, oh, I know! Let’s call her the Mistress of Wolves. Scratch that, how about Lady Badass, Kicker of Shins, Taker of Names,” Logan chirps excitedly. Without looking, Tristan reaches behind Kellan to smack him upside the head. “What about Luna?” Jace suggests quietly. A small smile plays on his lips as he inspects his nails. Something tells me he didn’t just pull that term from his ass. I still want to know what that little shit is hiding. “Goddess of the moon. Yes, I like it. Kitten is definitely goddess-like, and it’s fitting, all things considered.” Finn nods. “And you all could be ranked Betas. That way it’s still clear that they can come to you with issues as well as Kitten and myself,” Remy adds. “Um, can I not have a title, though?” Reed asks. “Me, too. I just want to help people as I always have. I’m content having you and Kitten lead. I’m still a changed wolf and Kitten’s mate, so it’s not like anyone is going to give me trouble over it,” Kellan says. Remy sighs heavily. “Fine. I already know which of you are going to ask the same thing, but you will still have the title of advisor because you have always been advisors to me, and I want no wolf underestimating your importance. So, as it stands I will be the only Alpha, and Kitten will be Luna. Ash and Jace will be Betas, with everyone else being advisors. That said, Albert will remain Omega, a title that now represents the personal advisor to the Luna.” “I don’t want to be Beta,” Jace scoffs. “Too damn bad. You’re good at it, and I need you. Ash will have full reign to punish and defend, while you will have full reign to attend matters in my stead. It makes sense.” I smirk at the golden boy as he huffs a “fine” in acceptance. Good, now if anyone bothers me with shit I don’t want to deal with I’ll just send them Jace’s way. For a good hour, we vent about all the things we’ve dealt with since arriving. Some of it is actually entertaining. I don’t spend a lot of time in the house like some of the others, but they tell me that ever since Kitten’s possessive display, the other females around practically run from them if seen in the halls or kitchens. We also talk about things we hope to accomplish, such as me wanting to form an elite group of enforcers instead of playing human soldiers, training for human-style fighting. Mostly, though, we talk about Kitten and the baby. How we’re lucky to have her, how she’s adjusting, and what it’ll be like to be fathers. We’ve never openly discussed it before, but I’m pretty sure that no matter whose scent the pup carries it won’t make a difference to us. We’ve been sharing everything for decades, and centuries for some of us. We all just want the experience of raising a child. On my part, I feel lucky to have seven other guys around to help protect our child. They can teach him things I don’t know myself, and be there when I can’t be. Not to mention, the more people around the less diaper changing for yours truly. “We should probably go check on Kitten. Either she’s taking the longest shower known to mankind, or she went back to bed. She needs to eat some breakfast,” Tristan suggests. “How’s that going by the way? Will she eat things that you don’t cook yet?” Reed asks him. “Yeah, some.” Tristan nods slowly. “She still won’t eat anything even close to resembling a sandwich or on a silver plate, but she’ll eat fruits, breads and snacks that I don’t make. I think I might see if she’s up to eating takeout soon. She still eats better when someone actually feeds her, though I think that has to do with her seeing how happy it makes us.” “Is she craving anything yet?” Kellan asks. Tristan frowns. “Not that I can tell. She has a new affinity for popsicles, but that’s because she didn’t know about them until the boys asked for some. She’ll scarf down food every now and again, but she doesn’t eat like she used to. Like she pecks for most of the day, but seems unable to stomach a full meal a lot of the time.” Kellan nods. “That’s fairly normal. Don’t worry, though. As the pregnancy progresses, that will change. Just keep an eye on it and remember that she doesn’t know much about proper nutrition, pregnant or not. She’s relied on her wolf’s healing abilities most of her life.” Reed returns, informing us that Kitten must have wandered off with Mikey. Looking like everyone is about to head off, I call attention to what started all this. “Jace, I still wanna know what’s going on, man. I gave you time to bring it up yourself, but you haven’t.” He sits back in his chair, looking for the world like a rock truck is weighing him down. A hand slides through his hair, messing it up. Whatever it is must be pretty bad for pretty boy to not notice his hair is out of place. “I don’t even know what to say. I’ve spoken to Albert about it, about why and how it’s happening, but I don’t even know if it’s real.” “If what’s real?” I ask. For the first time in a very, very long time I see Jace’s insecurity peek out. It took a long time for us to get him to understand that he can tell us anything. He used to have a real issue letting anyone know anything about himself that was less than perfect. He spent three decades pretending to be too concerned with his hair to swim with us when, really, he was just terrified of drowning and didn’t know how to swim. “Brother, I thought we were past this.” I shake my head, calling him brother to remind him that we’ll always have his back. He meets my eyes, the vulnerability still there, but determination rising through. “I think…I think I see Kitten’s dreams. That’s why I haven’t been sleeping much, and when I do it’s when she’s awake,” he admits. Finn pulls a face. “Kitten doesn’t dream.” “What do you mean she doesn’t dream? Everyone dreams,” Logan calls him out, looking at him like he’s crazy. Finn puts his hands up in “I don’t know” gesture. “She just doesn’t. If you haven’t noticed, she’s not like everyone else. Even her photographic memory isn’t a photographic memory. It’s different than any other case study ever done, though Eidetic memory has never been proven. While her mind stores the information like a file cabinet in her head and can be pulled up whenever she needs information, she can’t access it whenever she likes. I think it has to do with her being able to access her wolf abilities in human form. Much like her wolf helped her survive long before she ever turned, it may have been a coping mechanism for her lack of formal education. It seems her wolf always filled in the gaps that her human side couldn’t fill on its own. So, her not being able to dream isn’t that big of a shocker when you take into account she’s pulled off a feat that no other wolf or human has done in history.” “If I’m not simply going insane, then she does dream,” Jace states worriedly. “They’re probably not dreams, just moving pictures she has stored in her mind. Like movies. Or memories,” Finn says gently. Jace nods. “That makes sense, seeing as they’re all of her at a younger age. I kind of hope that I’m just going crazy, though. If those are her memories, then I don’t understand how she isn’t crying in a corner twenty-four-seven.” “Why? What do you see?” Reed asks, nearly falling off his seat as he scoots closer to hear. “Horrible, horrible things. This morning I woke her up because some pervert had drawn her to a secluded area after she waited a week at a park by herself for some man to return with food. She was also a very literal child, believing if she stepped on a crack she’d break some kid’s mother’s back. A mother who thought she was a monster and hit her with a broom. Idiot humans. Though because I can’t see her in these dreams unless she walks past something shiny, it makes me wonder if any of her wolf features ever shifted, or if she was just so unkempt as a child, as no one ever cared for her. My guess is the latter. I can just picture a tiny waif in tattered clothing; no shoes, the palest of blonde hair knotted and stuck to her head like a stray dog, covered in dirt.” He shakes his head, eyes lost to recollection and tearing up. Jace never fucking cries, and it’s making me uncomfortable. “In that book we found of Ivaskov histories, there was mention of bonds so strong that certain abilities were formed,” Finn tells us. “What abilities?” I ask. “In the book it said it was based on levels of domination. I’d have to read it again to remember the other gifts that were mentioned, but I’m pretty sure the ability to thought-share was in there, and that was for mates on or near the same domination level. Like I said, I’d have to look again,” he explains. “If you have time, do that today. It’s bothering Jace, and I’m sure we’re all curious now,” Rem instructs Finn before turning to Jace. “You’re going to have to talk to Kitten about this. For one, you can ask her if they truly are memories from her past and get reassurance you’re not crazy. And two, because this is a whole new level of privacy invasion and she deserves to know, and if it goes both ways, so she can be prepared for it to happen to her,” Remy instructs. Jace groans. “I don’t know how to tell her.” “You’d better figure it out. She thinks you’re avoiding her, which you are. You might want to think about what that means to Kitten. We recently found out she’s pregnant, and she formally adopted Michael without asking our permission first. More than likely, she thinks you’re mad at her for either of those things or you’ve lost interest. It’s hurting her,” he tells Jace sternly. Jace’s head rocks back at the revelation. He probably didn’t even realize how she could misinterpret his actions. “Is anyone else up for Mikey calling us Dad, or Daddy, or Father or some shit? It’s weird if he calls her Mom then straight up calls me Logan like I’m some unwilling stepdad caught up with her baggage.” Logan makes a disgusted face. I nod my head, grunting in approval. “His biological dad deserves to rot in hell for what he did to him. I’m all for being a team of dads who actually give a shit about him and look out for him.” A round of approving statements and head nods go around the room. “We’ll have Kitten inform him that it’s okay for him to call us that if he wants. We should let it happen naturally after that, though. I don’t want to push the idea onto him. He’s known Kitten for a longer time, and already thought of her like a mom, so it may take some time, if it happens at all,” Kellan speaks up. “I bet he calls me Dad before he calls you Dad,” Logan quietly challenges Tristan. He shakes his head with a smirk, but takes on the bet anyway. I roll my eyes at the two tricksters of our little family. Of course they’d make a bet on something like this. I used to wish that they’d grow up and mature, but their antics have grown on me over the years. Not that I’d ever tell them that. “We should go eat and find Kitten. We talked about a lot today that she should hear and get a say on. I for one feel a lot better now that we’ve talked some things out and there’s a tentative plan to move forward. Let’s keep in mind that we need communication among ourselves now more than ever.” Remy wraps up our chat, the other guys filing past on their way to the kitchen. He takes up a spot near me, leaning against the opposite wall. “That goes for you, too, you know? I know I’ve been different since everything happened with Kitten, and honestly, I’m still trying to find my way back from that. Having her taken from me like that…it’s hard to recover from. I should have seen it coming, should’ve been stronger or smarter about it. But don’t ever feel like you can’t tell me what’s going on with you. Even if it’s about me being a shithead and needing to pull myself together. We’ve lived lifetimes together; I’ll always care about what you have to say.” He clasps me on the shoulder roughly. I grunt, smirking at him. “I know. I was just giving you time. I get that it’s harder with her. I don’t lead this merry bunch of idiots, but I do protect us. Trying to balance being soft enough to love her and hard enough to be strong for her is a challenge. Just know that I get it.” We have a moment, both showing how serious we are and that all is forgiven. “Let’s go eat before Logan does something awful to our food,” I joke, bringing him in for a manly hug before shoving him roughly into the wall. His laughter booms in the hallway before he quickly catches up to me, a foot going out to trip me. If Logan and Tristan only knew they weren’t the original tricksters of the group. I shake my head. Too bad we never show them this side of ourselves. * * * Kitten My tail swishes through the snow yet again as I stare at nothing. I had gotten out of the shower only to find that my mates were enjoying some much-needed time to themselves. I was just slipping down the hallway, trying to not interrupt their moment, when I heard it. War. War was declared against us, and they didn’t tell me? They didn’t want to tell me. I hadn’t meant to overhear their conversation, but it’s hard not to when your name gets mentioned. I don’t know how to take this. Should I confront them? Act like I didn’t hear them? I should have stayed and listened to what else they were hiding from me. Do they think I’m weak and can’t handle things? I guess I am weak compared to them. I don’t know if I’m angry, or just really sad. Howling out my frustration makes me feel slightly better. Within moments several other howls echo back to me, creating the most beautiful song my ears have ever heard. I howl again, this time losing the sadness and letting my excitement show through. My tails sways behind me as, once again, the other wolves around the area sing back to me. I had shifted in a hurry so I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone for a while, but howling with these wolves makes me see that there are many ways to communicate now. It’s comforting to know that there are so many people out there willing to share in my feelings, even if they don’t know the cause of them. Eventually, I just listen to the rest of them as they continue. I pick up several emotions from them as well. Loneliness is the most prevalent, but anger, confusion, and heartbreak leak through, too. My poor wolves. Will we ever be able to leave the pain of the past behind, our songs joyous and happy? I may be hurt and confused at the moment, but I’ve had times of pure happiness along the way, especially lately. I wonder if some of these wolves have gotten to experience that. I hear and smell them coming long before I can see them. They come from the trees, bunched together with their heads low, moving slower the closer they get to me. I huff my annoyance at this and paw the ground, hoping they know I mean it like a person would pat the seat next to them. Who knows what it means in wolf language? I don’t have much experience with that. Although, I’ve noticed that if I stop trying to think like a human, instinct will take over. I take time to admire their coats, noticing that all but one has a variety of shades throughout their fur. They take up spots around me, surrounding me with their larger bodies. I don’t really know what they want, but I’m content with them being here. A few eventually break off to play, rolling around and biting at each other. I cross my paws and lay my head on them, feeling as if I could sleep in the sun’s warm rays. When I wake, it’s to a short bark from Albert’s wolf as he nudges the sleeping wolves who have managed to enclose me in a wolf pile while I slept. They mostly pay him no mind, but shift tails and legs out of the way so he can reach me. He squeezes in beside me, turning his neck so the top of his head can rub against my back just once. I look over to him, wondering what that was about. He pants happily as his eyes scan our surroundings. It takes a moment for the sleepiness to wear off, but once it does I remember why I’m out here in the first place, and know without a doubt that Albert knows about the war and didn’t tell me either. With a sigh I find my feet, taking a short moment to stretch. The other wolves stand, too, looking like they’re ready to go wherever I am. I shake my head at them, hating how their tails tuck and heads bend in sadness. I nip at a few ears and rub my head against a few of them, trying to lessen the blow and let them know I’m not purposely leaving them, and that I’ve enjoyed our time together. It seems to be the right thing. Albert, however, follows me anyway. He bites at my tail playfully as I trot along and I turn to growl at him. He lied to me, too, and now he wants to play? Nope. No way. Instantly his belly is on the ground, ears pulled back. I bare my teeth at him before resuming my return to the house. I feel the shift in the air just before his human voice calls out for me. “Princess, wait!” I ignore him, sprinting toward the back doors of the house. Once I get there I decide I’m still not ready to go in and face any of my mates, but I’d like to shift back. The problem is, I don’t know how to get clothes without going in. A young soldier passes me, bowing as he does so. I follow him and he stops, looking to me. I tilt my head as I try to think how to tell him what I want. Slowly, I move forward and grasp his pants between my teeth, giving a small tug. “Uh, Princess?” he asks, confused. I huff and do the same to his shirt. “You want me to…follow you?” He guesses. I shake my head. “Uh, you want me to undress?” My head rears back and I bark a resounding no. “She wants you to get her clothes, you idiot,” Albert chides as he comes up behind the man. Somehow, he managed to find a pair of black sweatpants. “I’ll get you something to wear, Princess. Then you might tell me what has you so upset with me.” He jogs into the house quickly. “Oh, thank God!” The soldier sighs in dramatic relief. “I didn’t really want to die today. The Alphas would have torn me limb from limb if we were to…you know. I mean, you’re beautiful, both as a woman and as a wolf, and it’d be an honor, but…I was hoping to meet my own mate one day, and I’d never get that chance if I was a headless corpse,” the younger man rambles. I’m not sure what he’s even talking about so I just sit, tilting my head and blinking at him until Albert returns with a bundle of clothing. He drops the clothes in front of me, unfolding a sheet and tossing another one to the soldier. “Hold this up, will you? The princess needs to get changed.” The younger man makes a face. “What does the sheet have to do with it?” he questions, even though he does what he’s told. “She wasn’t raised in a pack, as you should know. She still holds on to her human modesty,” Albert explains. “Oh. Right, I got you.” He nods, turning his face away from me as he holds out the blanket. I ignore the both of them as I quickly shift, stepping into the yoga pants sans panties and slipping on a cami and covering it with a thick green sweater. The soldier watches me closely as I untuck my hair from my clothing, running my hands through it. It never ceases to amaze me how, after every shift, my hair is softer and shinier than it has ever been. As an added bonus, it’s never tangled either. It’s actually easier to shift than to brush it out. He swallows thickly, his lips parting and tongue reaching out to wet them. “I…should go now. Yeah, I should definitely go,” he mumbles, balling the sheet up and turning away from us quickly. I turn to Albert. “He’s an odd one.” Albert chuckles. “Don’t hold it against him. He hasn’t had the opportunity to meet many females, let alone a beautiful, young, royal one.” I shrug a shoulder. “I don’t know why that would make him act so odd, but there are more females here now than ever before. And even if I don’t like some of them, they’re all very pretty. It makes me wonder if people think I’m beautiful because I’m a royal or whatever. Either way, I think most people are pretty and many things are beautiful, but I’ve always failed to see how that changes anything.” “That’s not what makes you beautiful, dear girl. But that’s yet another reason you shouldn’t be running around by yourself,” he says, pressing his lips together in disapproval. I narrow my eyes at him. “It seems we’re all doing things we shouldn’t, aren’t we?” I glance around, looking for a direction to head in. “Right. Would you mind telling what I did wrong now, please?” he asks. “If you walk with me. I don’t want to be around the house,” I tell him, already walking away. I head towards the dormant orchards, figuring no one else would be around. We walk in silence, giving me time to form rational thoughts and plan out what exactly I want to do about what I know. Albert strolls beside me, hands behind his back. I can tell he has to get used to my pace, since my legs are so much shorter than his. The trees are all bare, stick-looking things, but I still think they look pretty, all lined up in neat rows with equal spaces between them. After the twentieth row, Albert finally presses me. “Please say something, Princess.” I sigh. “When it’s just us, can you please just call me Kitten? I hear my name so rarely these days I’ve nearly forgotten it.” “I…will try, Princess Kitten,” he responds, making me roll my eyes. Maybe it’s the most he’s capable of? “I’m mad at you because I know you know about the war everyone is hiding from me.” I jump right in. He splutters out nonsense in shock. “How did you…” “It doesn’t matter how I know,” I interrupt. “What matters is that you and the others thought it was okay to lie to me and keep things from me. Do you all think I’m weak?” I turn to him, asking him earnestly. “What? No! No one thinks that of you,” he tells me vehemently. “Then why?” I almost whine. Albert takes his time answering, giving a deep sigh before he speaks again. “Because men are stupid?” he asks more than states a real reason. A sad smile crosses his lips. “Your mates and your grandfather will always want to protect you. At first, they thought you were acting strange and needed time to adjust. Then they found out you’re pregnant and…I think they didn’t want to stress you, giving you time to be happy about the baby. Also, in my opinion they think that, as long as you don’t know about the dangers in your life, they can’t harm you.” “But that’s so very wrong. Not knowing is always worse than knowing,” I scoff. “I think your mates are used to handling problems a certain way, and none of them know how to handle them when it comes to you,” he adds. “What’s your excuse, then? You’re not my mate, and the other day you claimed to be loyal to me only. Yet, you kept this from me,” I accuse. He sighs again. “Princess…” I shoot him a glare. “…Kitten. If I asked how many conversations we’ve had alone, what would you tell me?” “Including this one? Two. Or not really, I guess, since everyone was present for the last one, just standing back.” “Exactly.” He nods. “My place is on your right, standing slightly behind you. Not because of tradition or rank. But because it is the natural way of things. I exist to advise and protect the Alpha of this pack. If you had given me the opportunity to do what I’m supposed to, I would have told you.” I make a face. “You’re saying it’s my fault? I don’t know the natural order of things, Albert! I fell into all of this. And just because you tell me you’re supposed to advise me doesn’t mean I know what that means, or how to have you beside me, when I’ve barely had friends in my life to begin with!” I shout at him. “I understand that,” he says gently. “I’m not saying you’ve done anything wrong. Your trust in me will take time. I just ask that you might speak with me every now and again, and maybe give me tasks so that I might start earning your trust in me to accomplish them.” A large boulder sits off to the side of a row of apple trees. I take a seat on it, able to kick my legs against it as I think. Albert sits beside me, leaving plenty of room between us. “I have a task for you then,” I tell him, our eyes connecting. “I want to know how to contact all the pack leaders. And I don’t want you to say a word of this to anyone,” I say seriously. His eyes widen momentarily, his throat constricting as he swallows. He nods his head deeply, standing and turning from me. I can tell he slightly regrets the conversation now, but he wanted to earn my trust, right? This will be one heck of a way to do that.
Chapter Five
Chapter Five Avoiding people might be fine if you’re not a wolf, living with other wolves. Eventually, it was my traitorous scent that gave me away, as Jace found me going over multiplication flashcards with Mikey. At first he simply entered Mikey’s room, where we’d been hiding, and observed as Mikey rattled off answers for each new card shown. He’s really good at these, only struggling with times nines and twelves. He’s already on to division, but he struggles with the same numbers so we had come back to this. Finn told me his favorite math was actually geometry, he just didn’t want to move forward without Mikey having a solid foundation first. Only, Finn doesn’t know that we each get a gummy bear when Mikey answers correctly when we do flash cards. I eyeball Jace, wondering if he’s going to tattle on us. I had thought that once I saw one of them, the anger towards them would rise to the surface. But it hasn’t. Instead, it fizzled out completely. All I’m left with is sadness. Plain and simple, I feel hurt and left out. But until Albert gets me what I asked for, I don’t plan on revealing what I know. In my mind, they started it. “Hey,” Jace says softly. I realize I’ve been staring at him for a while now. “Hi,” I respond. We stare at each other. Neither one of us breaks eye contact. I hear plastic crinkling and I snap my head to Mikey, who has a mouthful of gummy bears and a multicolored smile as he gets caught. “Hey! You cheated; you didn’t answer any questions first!” I point at him. “And you!” I swing to point at Jace. “You helped him; you can see him and you didn’t say anything,” I accuse, a smile breaking over my face at their antics. “I have no idea what you speak of, oh beautiful lady of mine,” Jace says with his most refined accent, a hand over his heart as he bends to kiss me. His trademark smirk is in place as he pulls away. “You’re lucky you’re so charming. You just cost me several candies, blondie.” I narrow my eyes playfully. Jace laughs. “You realize you’re a blonde, too, right?” “Oh, is blondie an insult?” I ask, tilting my head. I’ve been called that several times, so I hope not. He laughs harder, reaching down to pick me up off the floor and drape me over his lap in one smooth move. “No, not really. Just the way you said it made it sound like that.” He brushes my hair away from my face with a finger. “Besides, you love my blonde hair. I catch you looking at it all the time,” he says confidently, making my cheeks heat. How he still manages that, I’ll never know. “If you guys are going to get weird, can I go play?” Mikey asks, already shuffling the cards not in my hand. “Ah, you’ll be weird one of these days, too, my boy. I don’t mind if you want to go play, you have to ask your mum, though,” Jace tells him, making the boy look to me. I smile and wave him off. Morris had gotten a set of Matchbox cars to add to his collection and I know Mikey has been wanting to get a peek all day. I turn my head back to Jace once the door closes behind Mikey. “Mum, huh? Don’t you mean mom?” “Nope,” he responds, flicking my nose. “I’m English, babe. Get used to it,” he says, making me giggle. He leans forward, kissing me deeply until we both need air. I sigh in contentment, moving my face into his shoulder. When was the last time I had a moment like this with Jace? Too long ago, that’s for sure. “I came to see if you’d like to spend the evening with me,” he says softly, holding me to him and stroking my hair idly. “Like sleep in your room tonight?” I ask for clarification. “If you’d like to. Though I was asking you to a proper date with me. It’s not safe to go out, but I’ve arranged something we can do here. So, Kitten Ivaskov, would you accompany me this evening?” He raises my hand to his lips, kissing the back of it. Oh, how Jace can make my heart melt with one flash of those golden eyes. “I’d love to,” I tell him breathlessly. “Good,” he says as he stands, my feet touching the floor as he takes my hand, opening the door for me. “Then get your pretty tush down to Logan so he can help you get ready.” He ends with a swat to my butt to get me moving. He passes me, going down the hallway to the stairs. He glances over his shoulder once, long enough to send me a wink and a wicked grin. He’s just so dang…good at this kind of stuff. “I look like a flower,” I say in awe, standing in front of the floor-length mirror. Logan comes up behind me, a satisfied smile on his lips. “Do you like it?” he asks. I nod my head vigorously. “I do. I feel so pretty,” I exclaim as I swish my hips, making the soft pink knee-length dress sway side to side. The silk material is layered at the bottom and shaped to resemble that of a flower. While the bottom is flowy, the top is form-fitting. The barely-there cap sleeves and bodice are lined with lace in a cream color, matching the strappy heels Logan helped me into. Logan takes out two small blue boxes, opening them to reveal a silver necklace that sits at my throat with a teardrop pendant that dangles when I move. Taking my wrist, he opens the other box and places around it a thin silver bracelet with shiny crystals or diamonds. “That should do it. You look stunning and delicate, just as I wanted you to,” Logan tells me as his hand fixes a few flyaways in my hair that he curled and brushed out, making it look wavy. He checks the silver comb at the back, making sure it’ll hold its place. “The bastard won’t know what hit him,” he adds with a smirk. “Thank you, Logan. I appreciate you taking time to do this. I’m nervous about the date, though. What do people do on dates?” I ask, biting my lip. Logan laughs, swatting my butt. “It’s Jace. You already know him. Date is just another word to describe spending time together, which you’ve done countless times. He’s a flashy bastard, so I know you’ll have fun,” he reassures me. Oh, well that’s not too bad then, is it? We both turn when there’s a knock on the door. Logan places a warming hand at the small of my back, guiding me to the door. Tristan pops in before we reach it, giving me a slow whistle and a wink, leaving the door open and taking a stance very close to Logan. The two share a look. Before I can ask, Jace appears in the doorway, looking as handsome as ever. He’s wearing a light grey suit, tailored just for him, complete with a matching vest and a white shirt with black buttons. It’s the not the first time I’ve seen him in a suit, but this one seems to showcase every fine feature of his lean and tall frame. His gold eyes contrast nicely, and his hair holds a wave to it, every strand perfectly in place. I wonder if his hair even knows how to misbehave? “Good evening, young man. What are your intentions with our Kitten?” Logan says in a deeper voice than is natural for him. I look to the side, seeing he has put his arm around Logan’s shoulder, both their faces set in stone. “Yeah. You better have her home by eleven or I’ll release the hounds and hunt you down, boy,” Logan adds dramatically. Jace peels his eyes away from me to shake his head at them. “You guys are idiots.” He sighs, but can’t hide his amused smile. The two others crack up then, high-fiving each other. Jace takes a step forward, offering me his arm. I smile softly as I take it, placing my hand in the crook of his arm and letting him lead me down the hall. “You look as lovely as ever, Kitten,” he tells me. “You’re quite beautiful yourself tonight, Jace,” I tell him honestly. He smiles brightly at me, revealing those perfect pearly-white teeth that belong in a toothpaste commercial. “I don’t know if I’ve ever been called beautiful before.” “Well, you are.” He totally is. “Wait, wait!” Reed stops us as he jogs out of his room. “Let me take some pictures.” “Yay!” I exclaim. I love the idea of adding pictures of the guys to my collection. Reed snaps away as Jace positions us for different poses. Just when I think we’re done he bends down to kiss my lips softly, only it’s been so long since I’ve had a taste of him that I can’t resist. His exotic and expensive scent invades my senses and I get lost in his soft lips momentarily. He pulls away first, not even out of breath. On the other hand, I’m sure my face matches my pink dress, and I’m nearly panting. “That will do,” Reed chirps as steps back into his room and closes the door. Out of the corner of my eye I see Jace exhale slowly through his mouth. Hmm, maybe I affect him more than he lets on. Jace leads me past Mikey’s room and further down the hall on our floor to an unused room near the end. My jaw drops as soon as the door opens. I step inside, hands flying to my mouth as I take in the transformation. “Jace! What have you done? It looks like an old English ballroom. I mean, it’s smaller, of course, but it’s like stepping back in time!” I breathe out. I’m shocked and so very excited. “How did you do this so fast?” When I feel like my eyes can’t handle any more details I turn back to Jace, who has taken to leaning against the doorframe. His eyes are on me, not the room, and I realize he was watching my reaction the whole time. “I wanted to dance with you. So, I made a ballroom,” he states simply. “I don’t know how to dance,” I tell him sadly, feeling like I’ve let him down after he went to such great lengths. He smiles then, stepping away from the wall to join me in the center of the room. He traces my jawline with a lean, manicured finger. “Everyone can dance, but I thought you might to learn to dance the waltz. I will teach you.” “Is it English night in the Ivaskov house?” I tease him, excited to get to learn something new. He laughs, placing a hand around my waist and pulling me close. We sway together, even though there’s no music yet. “The waltz isn’t a dance style native to England though, at one point, we did make it our own. You Americans got that from us. Though we could have never predicted soccer.” He shudders dramatically and laughs at his own joke. I laugh, too. “Funny. Finn told me that the term soccer actually originated in Britain as a way to distinguish association football, where the term comes from, versus the other types of football. Like Rugby football.” Jace rolls his eyes. “It’s not true if I choose to ignore it.” A pang of recognition hits me square in the heart. Is that what I’m doing when it comes to being hurt that the guys lied to me? Choosing to ignore the betrayal so nothing has to change between us? Before I can decide one or the other Tristan and Finn enter the room, each carrying a tray high above their heads and Mikey trailing behind them with a bucket. They walk straight to the two-person dining set situated against the wall, in front of the open window. They set the table with glasses, silverware, and plates of steaming food. Tristan helps Mikey to place the bucket full of ice and an opened bottle of Champagne off to the side. They wave shortly before making their exit. I stand back, amused. Jace takes my hand in his. “Dinner, my lady?” “Of course, my…Jace.” I fail at returning his banter. I don’t know how people spoke in England. Much less during the time period Jace was born. At least my attempt got a chuckle out of him. He pulls my chair out for me, timing perfectly when to scoot the chair in before taking his own seat across from me. He fills each of our glasses halfway, encouraging me to take a sip. It’s bubbly, like soda, and less sweet than it smells. It may not be something I’d drink all the time, but I do enjoy the light flavor on my tongue. I also have a glass filled with water, I imagine for if I didn’t like the Champagne. “Is this all English food?” I ask, my eyes raking over the unique dishes set before me. Jace tilts his head to the side with a slight shrug. “Food in England is more regional than anything, really. Though some things are universal, but cooked differently. Much like the Southeastern U.S. with their barbeque. Someone in Texas might not prepare pork ribs in the same manner as someone from Louisiana, but they are still pork ribs, and most people throughout the entire country eat them, even in the North.” “With our dinner Tristan has made some staples from England, but he always puts his own spin on his food. Like our black pudding here; I’m sure he sweetened it up more than someone who lives in England would prefer it, because your palate is used to more sweetness.” “I didn’t eat sweets a lot before meeting you guys,” I tell him, confused. He shakes his head. “No, not like that. Most foods made for Americans is made sweeter than anywhere else. Even if you don’t realize it. Pastas and breads, cereals and processed meats. Basically, anything that doesn’t come straight from the dirt is artificially sweetened,” he explains. I chew my food, thinking it over. How interesting. “It’s not like this in other places?” I ask. He dabs at his mouth with the cloth napkin. “Nope, it’s unique to here. While almost everyone enjoys sweets in some way, they don’t prefer it in everything they consume. That’s the biggest difference in “American food”, since this country never really had its own staples and foods. If you look at the top fast food restaurants you have hamburgers, which originated in Hamburg, Germany. Tacos, which of course are a Mexican dish. Pizza, which is Italian, and Chinese food which, naturally, is Chinese.” “Do you not consider yourself an American?” I ask. He makes a noncommittal sound. “I don’t know what I consider myself. I look like a human, but I’m not like most humans. I’m a wolf, but not a wolf. I’ve lived in parts of this country that weren’t part of this country at the time…” He shrugs. “But I was born in England, and it’s still part of England today, so it’s just easier to say I’m English. It’s how I was brought up, mannerisms that are ingrained and with a palate that is a hard thing to change fully,” he explains. “I guess I’m an American. You know, since I was born in this country and I’ve never left it. But, I mean, it’s not I’ve ever felt like I truly belonged to any place in particular,” I declare. He nods, finishing up his meal. “I can se that. Though, my opinion would be that feeling that you belong to a place doesn’t necessarily mean that a place feels like home to you. More like if a place feels like it belongs to you, that’s what makes it feel like home, or where you’re from. If that makes sense. England will always feel like home to me because it’s a part of me that I’ll never forget, even if it’s named something else in the future.” “I like that. Maybe that’s why you and the others feel like home to me, then,” I say with a smile. Jace shifts uncomfortably in his seat, taking a moment to respond. “That’s the reason I wanted to do all of this tonight. I know I don’t have much to offer you like the others do. Not like Ash’s fierce protection or Finn’s knowledge. All I have to offer you is myself, and I guess I wanted you to see a little of where I came from, as it’s still important to me. My family…I could do without remembering, but other things, like the tastes and country parties in the summers. Trying to stand out in a sea of people wanting to stand out…those things I’ll never forget.” I scoot my chair back, rounding the table to go to him. He slides back, but I put a hand on his shoulder to stop him from getting up. “Jace, if all you have to offer me is you, then I’ll never want for anything. You are all I’ll ever need from, well, you.” I giggle, hearing how that sounded. He reaches for my waist, guiding me to drape my legs over his. Then kisses me. Hard and deep and full of passion, just like him. Then…we dance. Or, I try to, at least. While we’re both having fun, I think I may have stepped on Jace’s toes a few too many times. I’ve never heard him laugh quite so much at one time, and I’m quickly becoming addicted to the sound. Jace may be one of my more refined mates, and I love that about him to no end, but it’s nice to see him open up and let loose like he’s doing now. I learned that the waltz is his favorite dance of all time and makes him feel powerful to perform it. Trying to dance makes me feel silly, but I like this. Any chance I get to stare into his golden, fascinating eyes, I’m going to take it. After what feels like both forever and only a moment, I find myself wrapped in Jace’s arms, slightly swaying to the soft instrumental music with my head pressed to his chest, my eyes closed. I hate to break the spell of the moment, but I feel as though if I don’t ask now, I may never know. “Jace?” “Hmm?” he answers. “Why have you been avoiding me? I love what you’ve done for me tonight, and I will always cherish spending time with you, but…you’ve barely been in the same room as me lately. Have I done something?” I bite my lip as I wait for his answer. I almost want to have done something wrong, so I’d know how to fix it. He sighs deeply, pulling back and lifting my face to his. “You haven’t done anything, Fun-size. I was just dealing with something. I am dealing with something. Which is another reason why I wanted this date before I had to tell you.” “Tell me what?” I ask, now more worried than ever. “Come with me. I’ll tell you in the bath,” he says, offering me his arm and walking us back to his room. He sits on the bed, sliding off his shoes and lining them up neatly. Unhooking the silver cufflinks at his wrists looks challenging, so I help him, placing them on top of his dresser. I unbuckle the straps of my shoes, setting them down beside his. The silence continues as we undress, looks shared between us. A bath has already been drawn for us, the water smelling of roses and full of fluffy bubbles and light pink rose petals. Jace climbs into the oversized tub first, reaching a hand back to help me step in without slipping. He takes a seat, stopping me from following him down into the pleasantly hot water. “What?” I break the silence. He shakes his head with a soft smile, starring at my tummy. My eyes follow his. There’s a slight bump, nothing too obvious unless you’re looking and knew what my tummy looked like before. “You’re starting to show,” he whispers, head leaning forward to lie against it. I run my fingers through his hair. My other hand traces over his strong shoulders. “It’s crazy, isn’t it?” I smile down at him. “You know what else is crazy? You not telling me what’s going on with you,” I joke, but I’m kind of serious. Placing a sweet kiss to my tummy he pulls away, helping me to sit between his legs, my back to him. I sigh in contentment as the heat surrounds me, the heavy scent of the water filling the space pleasantly. “I don’t want you to get mad. I’ve enjoyed our night so much. I don’t want to ruin it,” he mumbles behind me. “You’ll feel better once you tell me,” I say. Is this it? Is this the moment when one of them cracks and tells me about the war and how they hid it from me? Did Jace want to tell me, but avoided me because he felt guilty? “I see your dreams.” His low whisper takes a minute to register as my imagination spirals out of control. “What!” I shriek, turning around so fast that water sloshes over the side of the tub. He cringes, rubbing at his ear. “Calm down. This won’t be any easier if I’m deaf.” He pulls me back around into his arms, now holding me securely. “I didn’t know what they were at first. I just thought they were crazy dreams, like being attacked by a lion even though I’m nowhere near a lion and shouldn’t be afraid of that.” I remain silent, just listening. “Then I realized that it wasn’t normal to remember everything from dreams, and they were always of you. You at different ages and different places. It freaked me out, and eventually I went to Albert about it. He had said before that he was with your father for all the research he used to do, so I wondered if he ever came across anything like that. He had, but he needed to find the book where it was mentioned.” “Where what was mentioned?” I frown, not following. I’m more hung up on the fact that this is strike two for Albert not telling me things he should have told me. “Dreamsharing. That’s what it’s called. There are a few texts that mention side effects of mating bonds. Dreamsharing is one of them. Basically, I dream the same dream you’re dreaming,” he explains. “What did the texts say? And why can’t I see your dreams? I don’t even dream, I just replay memories.” I try to get out of the bath, my mind too cluttered with unanswered questions to be able to relax. Jace tugs me back to him, shushing me. “I didn’t read them myself. Finn said he’d take a look. He’s better at research than either of us, so just try to relax. I’m not ready to let you go yet,” he pleads. Since Jace never pleads, I let myself relax back onto him, chewing my lip in thought. “You’ve seen the dreams recently?” “I have. They haunt me even when I’m awake. I thought if I slept at opposite times of you, it would help, but there’s too many people around here. Too much noise to sleep during the day.” “Ah, I get it. You tried to show me something from your past, because you thought you owed it to me. Because you’ve been seeing mine. And you woke me up the other morning because you thought it was going to a bad place.” I nod, now understanding. “Uh, now that you say it like that, I suppose that was what I was trying to do. You’re not angry that I’ve been invading your dreams?” He brings his hand up, turning my head so he can see my expression. “No, I have no right to be angry about that. It’s not as if you’re trying to do it, or that you even enjoy it. I don’t know why you wouldn’t just tell me, though.” “I thought I was crazy. I didn’t want you or the others to think I was crazy, too.” “Can you see in my head any other times?” I ask. He shakes his head slowly in thought. “No, and it’s not every time I sleep, or you sleep. It just happens randomly.” I flip myself around, resituating myself so my knees are on the outside of his and my arms are lightly draped over his shoulders. I try not to get distracted at the intimate position this puts us in. “Have you tried?” My voice is deeper than I intended it to be. I clear my throat and shake my head slightly to focus. “Tried…what?” he mumbles, his hands slicking over my thighs and the gold in his eyes starting to swirl with heat. I groan, backing away from him to sit on the other side of the tub. “See, this why you shouldn’t have avoided me. We can’t even have a conversation without wanting to…well, I’d say tear each other’s clothes off, but we’re already naked,” I giggle. Jace laughs as well. He takes a deep breath, a hand running through his hair, making me wet. It wet. Making his hair wet! “So, you want to know if I’ve tried to get in your head at other times? Like when you’re awake?” “Yes!” I reply too quickly, and probably too loudly. I lower my voice and add more calmly, “That’s what we were talking about.” He looks at me oddly before his expression changes, giving me a knowing look. “I know what you’re thinking right now,” he teases. Oh, I highly doubt he knows just how badly I want to crawl on top of him and ride him until my legs are shaking, my wet hands slicking up his lean chest and into his gorgeous, perfect hair, messing it up. The image of just what that would look like flashes through my mind. Jace gasps, his mouth hanging open as his whole body jerks. “Holy shit,” he breathes. “What?” I ask, alarmed at his sudden change in behavior. “I saw that. What you just thought…I saw it. That was hot, by the way. Is it always like that in your head?” he asks me. “I didn’t say anything out loud…I don’t think.” Or, at least, I hope not. He sits up on his knees quickly, leaning toward me and sloshing water over the side of the bath. “You didn’t. I was looking at your lips. Quick, try it again,” he demands. I wasn’t trying in the first place. Honestly, I don’t know if I want Jace to hear my thoughts, or see them, however it works. What if I’m thinking of the other guys, like the other day when I had three of them. I can’t help the grin that forms on my face as I remember pleasing Logan so well he passed out right after. “Oh, nope. Not that, I don’t want to see that. Ever!” Jace covers his eyes, shaking his head as if to remove the image from his brain. I reach my hand out to him, apologizing profusely. “Jace! I’m so sorry. I was trying to not picture anything like that and I guess it made me focus on it.” I instantly try to picture anything else. A favorite park of mine as a child, the library in their old house with books on shelves everywhere, a pretty yellow flower I once saw that fascinated me. “Does that help any? Those things are better, right?” I ask. He huffs out a breath, trying to relax. Sitting back how he was, I look on, worried. “What things? What are you talking about?” he replies. I pull up the three images quickly. A park, the library, and a flower. Jace blinks a few times. “Yes, those are better. Did you think of them a minute ago, too?” I nod quickly. “Hmm, maybe I can’t see what’s in your head if you’re touching me? Come here, let’s test this.” I move back to my position on top of him. Before I can stop myself, the intimate image from before assaults me as I accidentally brush against him on my most sensitive spot. Jace growls hotly, his hands coming up to grip the backs of my thighs. “Nope, I saw that, too,” he tells me. “Hmm, maybe you just blocked me out before, because you saw something you didn’t like and were afraid to see more,” I supply. “Possibly. But you were right before. It’s been too long and, as much as I want to figure this out, I’m not going to be able to focus until I’ve had you. I want you, Kitten. I need you. I promise we’ll figure this out, but I need to be inside you. Right now,” he says harshly, eyes heated and pleading. I don’t need to be asked twice. I lift myself slightly, Jace positioning himself where we both need him. I slide down carefully, making us both groan out our pleasure. I hold on to his shoulders in a firm grip and repeat the process, adding in a grind at the base of him to add more friction on my sensitive button. Arching my back, I thrust my chest toward him, imagining his hot mouth suckling at my nipples. Jace thrusts up into me, hard. “As you wish, Princess.” Only then do I realize he must have seen what I thought. This could come in handy. His hands caress my back, up over my shoulders, and he uses the new position to pull me down harder onto him. My breath escapes me faster, loving the feel of him inside and all over me. I think this might be my new favorite. As my pleasure builds, I fulfil my fantasy and get my hands into all that brilliant golden hair, ruining the perfection and presenting myself with a hot, sex-mussed version of Jace. The new look sends a jolt straight to my core, squeezing tightly around him. I rock my hips faster at his groan. I wish I could see his thoughts like he can see mine. And…just like that…I could. Only Jace’s thoughts were in words, not images like mine. “Lord, I hope she comes soon. This feels too good. I won’t last much longer,” I hear from him. I’m far too worked up to have a conversation right now, explaining that I can apparently hear him, too, so I just tuck this away for now. I come to a stop, taking a moment to reposition us both, with him slid down a bit in the tub, causing him to recline slightly and giving my knees more room. I sit up straight, my hands flat on his chest, nails slightly digging in. I ride him. Ride him like my life depends on it, getting lost in everything but the sensations around me. The sight of Jace as he pants and groans out his pleasure, the smell of roses mixed with Jace’s expensive-man scent, and the friction and heat between my legs all work to send me crashing like a tsunami into a state of bliss. My head is still in an after-pleasure haze but I’m able to catch, “Fuck yes, pretty girl. Now my turn.” Jace moves so suddenly the world is a blur. In a split second I’m pressed up against the tile of the shower, my legs spread wide as strong arms pin them harshly to the wall, water cascading off of us both. Jace’s mouth presses into a hard line as he thrusts aggressively into me, lost in his own pleasure. It doesn’t take long at this pace for him to find his release. With a final thrust of his hips and an involuntary shout from him, I feel the warmth of his seed enter me. Jace crashes his lips to mine in a demanding kiss full of possession while wrapping my shaking legs around his narrow hips. On shaky legs himself, he steps out of the tub, grabbing an oversized fluffy white towel to drape around me, and carries me out of the bathroom. Once we reach his bed, he tosses back the covers and collapses with me on my back, his leg thrown over both of mine and his face pressed to my chest. Within ten seconds, he’s asleep. My entire body feels like jelly, but I manage to reach for the blankets to cover us both as best I can before closing my eyes and replaying everything that just happened. Picking out my favorite parts to save for when I want to remember them. I wonder if this new development between us really is a gift, or if it will be a curse. * * * Jace I wake slowly, aware that I’m alone in my bed. Kitten must have snuck off sometime earlier this morning. I sit, scooting up till my back hits the headboard. I make a face at the still-damp sheets, but follow it with a satisfied smirk. While I may not be able to stand damp bedding, the reason behind it makes me quite pleased with myself. I only wish the lovely blonde was still here, lying naked beside me. Stretching my lazy limbs, my muscles pull in all the right places after a night gone well. Last night was the best sleep I’ve had in forever. Shocking, really, since I was able have the conversation with my mate that was responsible for keeping me awake most nights. She took the news better than I could have expected. Though, there’s yet another addition to our bond that we’ve uncovered. Food. I need food. I contemplate staying in bed a tad longer, but my stomach gives an angered growl of disapproval and the wet linens nag at me. I wrap the sheet around my waist and make my way to the bathroom, brushing my teeth and drying the floor as the bathtub drains from last night. I have to keep fishing out the rose petals that threaten to clog the drain. I had intended for the bath to be for Kitten only, but the circumstances changed and it only felt right to join her. I’m sure I’ll catch hell from the guys for smelling like flowers, but it was worth it. So very worth it. Stalking from my room, grumbling about leaving my favorite hair pomade in Logan’s bath, I shoot a glare his way as we pass in the hall. He chooses to follow me. “I left it in your room again,” I say, idly opening his door and strolling in. “I’ll help you with it again, if you want me to. I was thinking of changing my hair. What do you think?” he asks, jumping up to sit on the sink counter. I raise a brow at him, handing over the container of specialized, imported hair product. It may cost a small fortune, but they donate to charity and it makes my hair look amazing. “That depends. How crazy are we talking? Not pink again, I hope. Also, keep in mind that we have a woman now, and Kitten quite fancies your hair. She may not like if you go changing it.” “First off, I’ve already done the pink thing, and you’re an asshole for bringing that up. It was the ‘90s! We all did things we regret.” He pauses, then shudders. I smirk back at him in the mirror as he starts applying product to my hair with a comb. “You just thought about Ash and Remy during their grunge period, didn’t you?” He nods solemnly. “I did. It still haunts me. All that fucking flannel. Yikes.” “I hear it’s making a comeback,” I inform him. “Not in this fucking house, it’s not. Anyway, I was looking through Vogue Paris and I noticed that some of the trendier 1920s styles were coming back for those who are able to pull them off. You know, I always regretted wearing hats back then. I told Remy that going sans hat in public wasn’t a damn fad,” he rants. “You’re not talking about that atrocious helmet-head, part down the middle thing?” I ask with a horrified expression. “While it may have worked for Lucky Luciano, everyone else looked like they’d dipped their head in a toilet.” Logan laughs, nearly dropping my comb in the process and leaving a weird wave in my hair. I take it from him, fixing it before it has time to dry that way. “No, man, I was thinking of leaving it mostly like it is, but shorter on the sides and slicked back up top, using product like your pomade. I’d need an inch or two taken off up top. Besides, Kitten caught me watching reruns of Boardwalk Empire and she liked that Jimmy guy’s hair,” he explains, moving a few last strands until they lined up perfectly. I tilt my head side to the side. Yep, I look damn fine if I do say so myself. The dark blue knit sweater I’m wearing with a white colored shirt underneath and gold crest accent my eyes and hair nicely. Hmm, maybe I need to change out my watch to something smaller, as it seems to distract from the sweater. Logan snaps his fingers in my face. “Oh, right. I think you could pull it off. It might help showcase your high cheekbones, too. Will you keep that streak of blue?” He shakes his head, twisting his lips in thought. “Nah, I was thinking a more classic look, but keeping it moveable enough to keep it soft and not greasy. She hid it well, but Kitten’s pulse went apeshit every time a strand of Jimmy’s hair fell forward. She’s not allowed to watch that show anymore, by the way. I lied and said it was filmed a long time ago and that dude’s probably ancient by now. I’ll be damned if she finds out he’s still young and hot.” I have to laugh at this. “Really? You lied to her about that? What did you think she would do, leave us and go find that actor?” I shake my head in amusement. “Don’t be a shit. If you haven’t noticed, our girl is hot as hell and could get anyone she wanted. So, I don’t want her wanting anyone but us,” he states seriously. I choose not to argue with him, though I think he’s being an idiot. “You want my help with your hair? I know you can manage the cutting on your own, but I can get the clippers and make sure it’s even on the sides and back,” I offer. “Shit-yeah, my dude, you know I trust no one else.” He claps his hands together, excited about the new hairdo. I roll my eyes at him as I browse through his collection of hair products, looking for the one that’ll help wash out that blue. “I hate how you pick up slang, Logan. Why does it always have to be slang that annoys me?” He nudges me out of the way with an elbow, finding the right bottle and setting it off to the side. I go to the closet and pull out a hand-towel, handing it to him. He pulls his shirt off, placing the small towel around his neck, starting the water in the sink and getting it to temperature. “I do it because it annoys you,” he jokes. “Besides, it’s how Reed talks all the time. I’m still glad he found himself as a surfer-slash-artist back in the day,” he adds. I pull out a shampoo and conditioner set that I know both Logan and Kitten like, and gesture for him to stick his head under. I’ll need to use the color remover first, then the others. “I do as well. Before that, he was a tortured and misunderstood artist, either brooding in front of a canvas or brooding everywhere else. I don’t miss getting sunburnt in Hawaii and California every damn day, but that time period really changed him for the better. He’s happier now. I know he misses the waves and water, though,” I add with a frown. Maybe we can find time for him, Kellan, and Ash to surf. “Yeah, I think everyone but us misses the beach life. They don’t understand our skin tones. They’ve come a long way with sunblock, though. If it wasn’t for this large pack thing, I might even suggest we go back. The Hawaiians will always welcome us, even if they know about us. Their culture welcomes the supernatural.” I finish washing his hair in silence. Thinking to myself about what it would be like to escape from here and live near a beach, with Kitten in a bikini most of the time. It’s tempting. More tempting than it should be. After our family talk the other day, it made me realize that I’m not the only one feeling stuck and useless here. Something needs to change, that’s obvious. Maybe we will end up near the water again—who knows what’s possible anymore. Over the next few days, Kitten and I try to work out this newfound connection between us. All Finn was able to find out in his research was that only strong bonds formed between mates of equal domination levels could produce this side-effect. That’s it. We’re on own figuring out how it works and the best ways to use it. So far, we’ve figured out that the push and pull on both ends must be open for us to communicate. If I’m not pulling from my side, then it doesn’t matter if Kitten is pushing on hers. I won’t get the message. We’ve also learned that Kitten is able to hear me as if I’m speaking to her in her head, which drowns out anyone else around her, while I am able to see scenes playing in her mind like a movie. Finn’s estimated guess on this is that some people think in words while others think in images, and the two of us are just going to have to figure out how the other one thinks. Which is easier said than done, since whenever Kitten sends me an image I’m blind to everything else. I almost fell down the stairs once when she imagined herself floating high in the sky on a cloud, the ground far below her. I was so scared, I’m fairly certain I almost had a heart attack. I have to keep reminding myself that not everything I see from her is reality. Kitten’s imagination is vast and detailed. She may not be able to dream in R.E.M. sleep, but she can create worlds while awake if she wishes. I can see now why she’s such a great budding artist. With help from Reed, she might even surpass his abilities. The only thing I can’t quite figure out is why Kitten completely blocks me whenever she spends time with Albert. We’ve both slipped up many times, not realizing we were either pushing or pulling, but her mind is a fortress whenever she’s with him. Which seems to be more and more often lately. When I asked her about it, she said they’re working on their own dynamics in their new roles for the pack. They have to learn to work together, and that’s as much as she’s shared. I didn’t press her, but I’m determined to get to the bottom of it. She can’t hide from me forever.
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